(Part Two)



Yasyah pada-nakhendu-rashmi-sudhaya chittassamudbhaasitah
Kaarunyaambudhi-vaah-vega-rabhasaa paapaah samunmoolitaah
Maanjishthe vasane nileena-madhura premaika-peetha chavihi
Tad radha-pada-padma-raaga-rasiko bhrngo bhaveyam sada
The nectarian rays of whose moon-like toe nails has lit up my heart, whose very force of the current of the ocean of mercy uproots all sins, whose unrivalled golden complexion of sweet love is hidden behind the golden garbs, I desire to be the infatuated mellow-relishing bumblebee of the lotus feet of that Sri Radha.

Krishnastvam nanu radhikaapi madhura neelaakta-peetotsavah
Nityatvam yugalo~pi ko~pi lalito hyadvaita leelaatanuhu
Kaanta-kaant-samaashrita ati rasika ya projjvalaa paavani
Tad radha-pada-padma-raaga-rasiko bhrngo bhaveyam sada
You are Krsna. You are the sweet Radhika too. You are the golden coloured dalliance of bliss covered in bluish luster. You are the one and only eternal divine couple. Your body is an expression of non-dual pastime. Priyatam and Priyatama are eternally residing in you. I desire to be the infatuated mellow-relishing bumble bee of the lotus feet of that Sri Radha who is the pure embodiment of ujjval-ras.

Agre shyama vapusthaivam adhare prshthe api raaraajate
Vaame vaapyapi savyake api purato baahye yathaabyantare
Drshye drashtari darshanena sakale preenaati yaammadhavah
Tad radha-pada-padma-raaga-rasiko bhrngo bhaveyam sada
Your body is dark complexioned in the front, even at the back and below, on the right and left and in the inside and outside. In this way Madhav pleases You in sight and in all. I desire to be the infatuated mellow relishing bumble bee of the lotus feet of that Sri Radha.
Kujatkokila-saarika-khagakule nrtyan mayuraavrte
Jyotsna-vichchurite nikunja-ramane hy aananda-vrndavane
Manjushyama-surupaya anucharita lila yayonmaadini
Tad radha-pada-padma-raaga-rasiko bhrngo bhaveyam sada
Who, In the form of Manjushyama, illuminated the delirious pastimes in that blissful, moonlit Vrndavan with attractive groves and filled with the chirping of Kokilas, parrots and other flocks of birds and surrounded by dancing peacocks. I desire to be the infatuated mellow relishing bumble bee of the lotus feet of that Sri Radha.
Tvad vatsalyam abhikshmaana-muditah dvaari sthito bhikshukah
Yaache aham pranipatya kaataramanaah baddha pranamaanjalih
Aahlaadaikamayi tvayi prakatita yaantah sthitha mohini
Tad radha-pada-padma-raaga-rasiko bhrngo bhaveyam sada
Seeing your affectionate nature, this pleasant beggar standing at your door, begs you with folded hands and a craving heart that let me remain the infatuated mellow relishing bumble bee of the lotus feet of that Sri Radha who is illuminated in you and is residing within you.
Maangalyo pramaashrayas tvamasi me shreyaskari sampadah
Chaika tvam mama jeevane madhurima chaante cha bhaagyodayah
So~hante pad-dasa-dasa-sharane yaache dayaashevadhim
Tad radha-pada-padma-raaga-rasiko bhrngo bhaveyam sada
You alone are my all auspicious ultimate shelter, and you alone is my topmost wealth. You alone is my life’s only sweetness, and towards the last moments of my life you alone will be the bloom of my fortune. O wealth of compassion, I , the shelter of the servant of the servant of your lotus feet, begs you that I may become the infatuated mellow relishing bumble bee of the lotus feet of that Sri Radha.
Vaardhakye galito tanushcha palito mundo abhavachreehatah
Vishrabdho vacanaamrtaishca bhavatas supto sukhi nirvrtah
Saakshaanme shikhi-picha-mouli-lalitam vamshi-dhvanantam priyam
Paarshve mohana-mohini-surasikaamaalokyishye khalu
My body has deteriorated in this old age. My face has lost its luster. Hair has turned white. Still, by the solace of the nectar of your words, I rest in happiness and bliss. Indeed I will have the darshan of my beloved, who is decorated with peacock feather crown and plays his flute, along with the rasamayi Mohan-Mohani on his side
Nityam mahabhav-nimagnasheelam preshtham rasaadvaita-sudeepta lilam
Bhaktaartiham bhaagavataagra ganyam namaamyaham preeti rasaavataaram.
He, whose eternal nature is to be constantly submerged in mahabhav, who is dear, in whom the pastimes of unrivalled mellows are brightly illuminated, who is the crest jewel among devotees removing the anguish of all devotees, unto the lotus feet of that Baba, who is the incarnation of loving mellows, I offer my unlimited obeisances.

Pran Nath Sharma
(Vishwambhar sharan pathak)

|| Sri Hari ||
Note from the Publisher

Inorder to inaugurate to an extent the dignity of the most worshipable Babuji and Baba and Gita Vatika, 11 books have been published step by step. They are :-
1. Param Bhagavat Sri Poddharji
2. Sant Hruday Sri Poddharji
3. Mahabhavodadhi Sri Poddharji
4. Vatika Venu
5. Vatika Vatayan
6. Vatika Vaibhav
7. Vatika Veethi
8. Vatika ke patra pushp ( in 4 volumes)

One must understand from these books that whatever events came up in front of us were instantly put into words. When these written events were published as books, the year wise sequence was not kept in mind. There was a constant request from our own and dear ones to publish the biography of worshipable Baba in sequential order from the beginning to the end. Sri Bhimsenji Chopda accepted this request. The descriptions in this purifying biography have all been previously published in the above mentioned eleven books. Some of the important topics from those previous publications are collected in this book in a yearly sequential order. For a detailed knowledge all those volumes are to be reviewed. I am experiencing ultimate happiness in presenting this most purifying biography of worshipable Baba to the devotees.
I feel the necessity to give a clarification related to this compilation. In this book, the usage of the word ‘Babuji’ denotes the respectable Sri Hanuman Prasadji Poddhar and the word ‘ Baba’ denotes the worshipable Sri Radha Baba.
It is natural to make mistakes inspite of being attentive. We humbly apologize for any mistakes or oversights that must have occurred in this compilation. Upon receiving indications by our near and dear one’s in future we will get the opportunity to cover up our mistakes.
Yogendra Nath Banka

||Sri Hari||
Note from Publisher

( A request with regards to the second edition)

It is a great pleasure that the society has offered full respects to this book. Time to time we kept receiving letters from our readers, which expressed the appreciation of the book. Within a year itself the first edition came to its limit, therefore we had to print the second edition.
Many dear ones have lovingly expressed that many events related to worshipable Baba has not come in the book. Inorder to give due respects to their desires, many events have been compiled in this book. As a supplement, we have also included the life story of the worshipable Sri Chimmanlalji Goswami at the end of this book.
Due to urgency, the first edition had many faults. We have tried our best to remove those faults. We beg to apologize if there are any more faults, even after this. Please keep us informed of any faults that you may come across, so that we may rectify the same in future. I wish that this volume gives inspiration to the life of all the readers.
Yogendra Nath Banka

(Part Two)

Radhashtami 1956
Baba performed his final night-vigil and his final exceptional Naam-sankirtan in 1956 on the day of Radhashtami. On the sarad purnima of 1956, Baba took up his vow of kasht-moun (strict- silence). This incident is of the Radhashtami that falls before sharad purnima. This year, in the month of Bhadra, it rained heavy. So much so, that the wells were filled with water upto the brim. There was not a need of a rope. One could just fill water in the buckets with one’s own hands. It was difficult to get the clothes dried after a bath. However, the heavy the rain, the heavy was the bliss. Like the thunder in the sky, rather, heavier than that was the thunder of bliss in the festival. After the birth of Radha, an exceptional sankirtan of Radha-Naam was celebrated. Baba was ringing the bells. He played non-stop for about two-and-a-half hours. Everyone was in rhythm with Baba’s voice playing the instruments to his beats. There was not the least mismatch, nor any push and pull, nor any unruliness. The sankirtan was full of bliss for everyone.
Baba performed his night vigil also. There were only Thakur Sri Ghanshyamji and 5 or 6 other people for the night vigil. The festival went on till 12 in the night. After 12, some people stayed with Baba for the vigil. Baba sang a verse –
‘Kalindi ! flow gently, my Priyatam will cross over’.
None were aware of the time that elapsed as he detailed the descriptions of Krishnapriya Sri Radharani moving towards the banks of Yamuna, the banks covered by durva grass, Radha’s entry by placing Her lotus feet on the durva grass, the bliss attained by the durva grass upon receiving the touch of Her lotus feet, the flow of the pure waves of Yamuna, and Radha being appealed by the dark waves. Baba was in a semi-lying posture describing all these events and everyone was absorbed listening to them. They did not realize that four hours had passed and it had dawned 4 am.
* * * * * * *

The vow of kasht-moun
The days when Baba, as per the suggestion of Babuji, had stopped giving lectures and accepted the vow of normal silence, he would be absorbed in mellows of Sri Radha Madhav’s pastimes in the mood of Sri Manjulila Manjari. In Manjulila’s mood, separation was in predominance. The vow of silence created more favourable circumstances for this. His absorption in the pastimes became more profound. Baba remained in Sri Manjulia bhav for about 4 years and thereafter he established himself in Sri Manjushyama bhav. Day by day his dive into the mellows became more intense. During this period, Vrajendra Nandan Sri Krsna advised him to engage in the worship of Goddess Maha-Tripura-Sundari. Lord Sri Krsna did not mention the method of worship, but by the mercy of the Lord the method revealed itself in the mind of Baba. Baba attained complete success in his worship and in 1959 on Akshay Tritiya day, the Goddess appeared before him and gave him her own mantra.
This shakti-worship was the foundation for his future mahabhav life. What did Baba know about his future situation to be; however the all-pervading and expert-majician Lord Sri Krsna was moving him forward step by step towards that transcendental stage. Baba began to go deeper and deeper into the ocean of bhav. The ocean of bhav began to rise higher and higher in Baba’s life. The world did not appeal to him. Even the remembrance of the world would pain him. Besides, he even felt his bodily-consciousness as a distraction. It was a natural state for Baba to constantly be submerged in the ocean of ras. Why should there be any obstacle in this continuous submerge, therefore in order to have an obstacle-free and deep-flow of ras, Baba decided to take up the vow of Kasht-Moun. Even behind this decision indirectly was the plans of the Lord who had long before released him from giving lectures, thus making favourable situations to accept the vow of silence of speech. To accept the vow of kasht-moun was not any step that Baba could take in his sadhana-stage. If this would have been one of the steps that could take one to one’s goal, then on the day of Sarad Purnima no sooner he took up kasth-moun how could Baba instantly transcend his bodily stages? Constant flow of ras was a very natural stage of perfection for Baba. This kasht-moun was taken up to overcome the obstacles caused by bodily-consciousness to that consistent flow of ras. Not only did he instantly transcend the bodily-consciousness, but during the period of the kasth-moun, his situation was so deep and intense that seeing him it was very clear that it was nothing but the lila of Lord Sri Krsna to make him accept the vow of kasht moun.
Baba had indicated about his decision for kasth moun to Babuji in the beginning of year 1955. Hearing this Babuji accepted it with a delighted heart. Baba did not consult or discuss with Babuji about his vow. This also proves the fact that behind such a severe and austere vow was definitely the divine inspiration. If not for a divine inspiration, he would have surely seeked Babuji’s advise prior to making such an important decision. Rather Baba even mentioned that he has decided to take up this vow on the sarad purnima day of 19 October 1956.
Baba explained the meaning of kasth moun that – it means not simply the silence of speech, but also to seclude oneself completely at all times from the entire world and from one’s own body, and in this way maintain silence with everyone. This explanation by Baba explains only the external characteristics of kasth moun. However the true nature of Baba’s kasth moun was described by Babuji in his lecture in April 1967 that – In the life of rasa-siddh personalities, one such ras arises which in future becomes an ocean. Unlimited waves arise in this great ocean of mellows and he swims in those waves. Sometimes he comes to the shore and is seen outside and sometimes he remains within the waves. And this kasth moun is the transcendental stage of this constantly increasing flow of ras.
It was also a divine inspired coincidence that before the acceptance of kasth moun itself, the pilgrimage to the three Dhams by train was accomplished in the beginning of 1956. Upon returning from this pilgrimage, Babuji fell ill. It is a natural outcome of long pilgrimages, but during this illness he could be in complete seclusion and had good opportunities to be absorbed in the lilas of Priya-Priyatam Sri Radha Madhav. Gradually Baba’s date for his vow was getting closer and the crowd of friends in Gita Vatika began to increase. Everyday someone or the other kept visiting from every nook and corner of the country, far and wide. Upon hearing the news, anyone who had even the least attachment for Baba proceeded towards Gita Vatika. People kept visiting Gita Vatika as they were not sure if Baba would ever speak in the future, and so they may have his darshan and receive sadhana related instructions. Baba spent time with each and everyone who came to meet him. Every individual received atleast 15 to 20 minutes to talk with Baba. Baba inspired everyone to accept a life full of sadhana. A couple of examples will be sufficient to get a glimpse of the kind of conversation that people had with Baba.
Baba had to commence his vow on 19th Oct. And on 18th Oct Baba had given an appointment to Dr.Sri Ghanshyamji Tholani. Dr.Tholani had come from Nasik. He had treated Baba in the mood of seva in the pilgrimage train. Babuji was very pleased and impressed with Dr.Tholani’s desireless seva and his devotion. Baba called upon Dr.Tholani and said – “Please remember my words – Sri Poddhar Maharaj has deep affection for you. This love of Sri Bhaiji is a great treasure in your life.”
Dr.Tholani said – Baba ! It’s a great fortune upon me to receive affection from such a great saint like Sri Bhaiji. Sri Bhaiji emphasizes heavily on chanting the Hari Naam, but I have no taste in Hari Naam.
Baba said – There is no difference between the name and the Lord Himself. Lord’s name is the very form of the Lord Himself. And by the mercy of the Lord’s name, one gets the taste. During sadhana period, a sadhaka goes through ups and downs. One should not fear the adverse circumstances and neither should one become disappointed. In the end you will definitely attain the Lord. Please have complete faith in this. I’m not tricking you. I’m telling the factual truth.
Overwhelmed with such an assurance, Dr.Tholani said – Let your mercy be upon me.
Instantly Baba said – My Mercy ! You can’t imagine the extent and the kind of my mercy. Till the end you will be connected with me.
Dr.Tholani, with his heart full of emotions and eyes filled with tears, offered his obeisances unto Baba and went away.
Another incident of a meeting with Dr.A.C.Saha is even more wonderful. Dr.Saha was a homeopathic doctor in the village of Padrona. He and his friend Mr.Haridwarmalji Tidadewal came from Padrona to meet Baba at Gita Vatika. Baba gave them a one hour appointment for the day of caturdashi for early morning hours. Both of them were extremely delighted. After waiting for a day or two, arrived the morning of caturdashi. They were excited to get to talk. The day passed on from morning to evening, however, for some reason or the other they could not get to talk. The two were disturbed if Baba would be able to talk to them prior to the commencing of his vow.
Baba performed his bhiksha in the varanda in front of the pooja room inside the banglow. Then he came out. Immediately, they told Baba – “We are waiting upon you from morning to talk to you. However, it is already evening now.”
Baba replied, “I have given you the time and I have already spoken to you.”
Greatly surprised, they thought – What is Baba saying!! They requested – “Swamiji ! We have not got the time with you. We are awaiting you from morning wondering when we will get the chance. Baba again said, “But I have already spend my time with you”. They thought that probably Baba is in illusion. Therefore to make it more clear, they said, “You had given us one hour time, but truly you have not yet spoken to us.” Baba again said, “Even I’m speaking the truth that I have not given you one hour, rather I have given you two hours of my time. I have given you so much time that you cannot comprehend.”
Now what can they say? They stood quiet in complete despair in front of Baba. Regret and agony were dancing in the eyes of Dr.Saha and Sri Haridwarmalji. Now clarifying the situation, Baba said, “I remembered you in the morning. I remembered you with a mind connected to Lord Krsna. Do you think that one second at Krsna’s abode is equal to one second of this world? The entire ‘Time’ of this world cannot be contained within one second of the spiritual world. You cannot conceive what you must have received at that time when I remembered you with a mind connected to Krsna.
Hearing this, their hearts began to melt. With eyes full of tears and choked voice they said, “What can we ordinary living entities with limited vision comprehend on such deep matters!! We were uselessly thinking otherwise. We came with sadhana related insignificant questions to be clarified, however, you have bestowed upon us that object of the sadhya kingdom, which is far beyond the solutions. We have now attained such a great assurance and great faith which is unattainable by even the most austere sadhanas. We can’t even conceive what you have done for us out of love. Our hairs are standing on ends seeing your love.
Saying this Dr. Saha and Sri Haridwarmalji offered obeisances to Baba. All those who came to visit him during this period of kasth moun and those from Gorakhpur, all received their utmost satisfaction from Baba one way or the other.
Prior to taking up the vow of kasth moun, Baba even gave up all his other processes of worship. We don’t have the complete details of them. As an example one or two can be mentioned. Every day Baba use to do seva of “Vrajrajvati’, and it was not possible to maintain it, therefore he surrendered this norm unto the lotus feet of the Lord. Similarly, he distributed all the items related to his worship and prayers to appropriate candidates. For example, he gave away his book on Sri Lalita Sahasranama to Sri Krishnaji. He gave archana book to Goswami Sri Chimmanlalji.
Slowly the time to accept the vow of kasth moun was drawing near. People were becoming greatly horrified with the thought that they will never in the future be able to associate with Baba. No sooner there was a little slacking in their bhajan-sadhan, they would come running to Baba and as a result of merelytalking with him for just a short while, all the causes for the depressions would simply wither away, the mind and body would be filled with complete enthusiasm and all the thorns on the path of sadhana would turn into flowers. Now their minds were filled with the question as to where they will attain that enthusiasm and those inspirations. As a result of this deficiency, their discomfort was constantly rising high. It was the greatest fortune of they who used to get the opportunity to sit close to Baba and never realized the limits of time in his presence. Today all their hearts are shrieking from within, seeing the end of their great fortune. Now they will never get to hear and see Baba’s smiling lips, those loving eyes, those inspiration filled talks – this presumption alone caused an outcry within the hearts of those who were sheltered under him, but whom to tell this anguish and what to tell!! Everyone was obsessed with this anguish. It is an eternal truth that Baba was going to accept such a severe vow which would raise the glories of devotional sentiments and such a great Baba is our own personal associate, just these very thoughts made the heart fill with transcendental bliss and feelings of dignity, however at this very moment that very feelings of dignity were covered up by an unflinching pang, a throe, which had no forbiddance. Even though it was against their wish, everyone assembled in the pandal to bid farewell to their life’s wealth Sri Baba. Now only one or two hours were left for the mid-night hour to begin.
Baba took up his vow of silence at midnight at the same pandal where Radhashtami festival was celebrated. Devotees began to assemble at the pandal from 10pm itself. People from Gita Press as well as people from the city all assembled. Before arriving at the pandal, Baba and Babuji had some private talks for some time. Then Babuji came along with Baba to the pandal around 11pm. They both sat on the platform that was made for them. The hearts of all those assembled were filled with unlimited agony. All eyes were stuck on the parting Baba. All were staring at Baba who was seated in the robes of a sannyasi. People used to look at the expressions on Babuji’s face to estimate the meanings it conveyed, but now all their center of attraction was on Baba who was sitting beside Babuji. People were drinking the golden effulgence of Baba emanating in the midst of his sannyasi robe.
The essence of some of the most important points that Baba requested at that time of departure in the midst of all those present are –
In life, only a rare unfortunate soul can say a lie at the time of death. My experience is that, he would do that only out of force or helplessness. I am going to die.
‘That which is written by Nandanandan, can never be changed by any’
A bumble bee roaming around in the forest does not sit on a champa flower. Is the flower not beautiful or is the bee devoid of taste for honey? Champa is extremely beautiful and the bumble bee is greedy for honey, however the Lord’s will is powerful. I have come to perform worship of love.
Kasth moun is not a big thing. It is the practice of sannyasis and it must be performed. There is nothing in me for sannyas. My mind felt that the rest of my life be used in this way. This is the practice of the ascetics. The rule of kasth moun is that it should be accepted only on the banks of Ganga. The best way to drop one’s body is walk towards the main source of Ganga, drink from the water flow of Ganga, extend your hands when hungry if anyone ask for it. If it is eatable, then eat, else throw it off. If clothes fall off, do not tie it yourself, if someone else ties it for you, tie it.
My kasht moun is ‘incomplete’. Because, Bhaiji is doing all arrangements for my comforts, I am accepting bhiksha from here. Bhaiji has love for me. That I experience constantly in full depths. I went to meet Bhaiji and instantly his eyes were flowing with currents of tears. I will not speak much on Bhaiji. He is sitting right here in front of all of us.
If Sri Poudhar Maharaj is a rose plant, then on that plant is one of the branches on which I am a small little rose flower and will always remain smiling. Rose also has thorns, but this rose plant is free of thorns. This plant has the capability to blossom not one, but many many flowers that are more beautiful and more superior than me.
During kasht moun, one is neither supposed to look at anyone, nor talk, nor read, nor indicate or write. But Kasht moun also has another meaning – A devotee, Radheshyam, does my seva, he is filling water from the well, his feet slipped and he fell into the well, at that time I will not remain silent, I will scream out loud that Radheshyam has fallen into the well. Not only that, I will also jump into the well inorder to save him. If his life is saved it’s ok, if not, both mine and his life will be offered unto the lotus feet of the Lord.
I do not know what the situation of my mind will be as I go ahead. My speech will be only with Bhaiji. Eighteen months back itself it was decided that on this day of Ashvin Purnima, I will become silent. Bhaiji, such a great saint – I consider him a saint only – will take care of me until the last moments. If Bhaiji faces any disturbances in relation to any situations, at that time I will speak and enlighten him, this much I will endeavour. Savitri’s mother made me do bhiksha like her own son. When I will go for begging, I will look at her. As for my vision, it will be restricted only to Bhaiji and Mother.
The auspiciousness present in the funeral fire is also present in the glow of the maternity ward. Life and death are the two veils in the kingdom of God. If Bhaiji is leaving his body, then no sooner I receive the indication, I will come. A devotee’s heart is filled with compassion. Just now when I went to meet him, Sri Bhaiji began crying out aloud.
Please worship the Lord who is beyond this universe. My Radha is unique. In actuality, who so ever has even a drop of lust in his mind, does not have the qualification to worship my Radha, be it man or woman.
The love that all of you are giving me, is none but Radha Kishori giving me in so many forms. In your life, please do not forget the Lord for even a moment. The Lord was, is and will always be present. One needs pure eyes to see Him.
Hey Radhakishori ! Hey Krsna ! I seek your blessings –
Dehu daya kari daan na bhoolo keli ko
Bhagavat valit tamaal bilokon beli ko
Narak svarg apavarg aas nahin traas hai
Jahan raakhoun tahan rahoun maani sukh raas hai
Dukh sukh bhugate deh, nahin kachu sank hai
Ninda astute karou raav kyaa rank hai
Paramarath vyavahaar, banou kai naa banou
Anjan hvai mama nayan ‘rasik bhagavat’ sanoun.
Let me constantly see Radha Krishna alone. Let them both reside in my eyes like kohl.
After Baba spoke, Babuji began to speak. Babuji said – Swamiji’s kasht moun is about to begin. All his relationships with the external world is coming to an end. Even I am sad about this, however the ultimate spiritual relationship is indestructible.
The real relationship is on the basis of Sri Radharani, and that relation can never break, it is made for ever. There is nothing to fear. My relationship with him, is known only to the Lord, I do not know, he too perhaps may not be knowing.
I wish to see his ascetic form to such an elevated level that he may be an ideal for others in this world. I am enthusiastic to see him as the ideal follower in the path of ascetism. Upon knowing about his vow of silence, externally I did not consent to it, but mentally I approved it.
Let his life be full of Radharani. Let the waves of his life inundate this world with the mellows of the nectar of pure unalloyed love. I do not know about the future, but if he attains divine ecstatic bewilderment, as was seen in the final days of Lord Caitanya Mahaprabhu in his Gambhira pastimes, then I heartily welcome that. The waves of mellows ……..
As Babuji was speaking the clock struck twelve, and Baba immediately said – I’ll take up silence from here.
Saying this Baba stood up on the stage and twice or thrice he said ‘Radha’ ‘Radha’ ‘Radha’ and instantly he became profoundly inward. Babuji gave indications to everyone that Baba has become silent. No sooner Babuji gave indications, many people in actuality began to cry sobbing. Many had covered their sound of crying behind their lips. Some did not want their eyes to least express the pain of their heart, but it was not in their control and they wiped their eyes again and again with their dhoti or saari. Someone remembered the lines of Mirabai –
Jo mai aiso jaanati priti karai dukh hoy
Nagar dhindora peetathi preet karo jani koy
(Meaning – If I would have known that the ways of love are so painful, then I would have beaten the drums in the entire town to announce – not to fall in love.)
One woman was suffering so much of agony that for three days continuously she remained in the state of bewilderment. The entire pandal was filled with such deep silence. It should be said that, that silence engulfed the entire Gita Vatika and obtused the jubilation of each and every individual there. Everyone, with dried lips, indecisive intelligence, disturbed heart and with tear filled eyes saw Babuji slowly bringing Baba down the stage and Babuji began to walk with his hand on Baba’s shoulder. As they were walking, the wrap on Baba’s shoulder fell down on the earth. At this stage itself Baba had transcended his body to such an extent that he never ever realized the wrap falling off. The devotee who picked up that wrap kept it safe in his altar room. This wrap became his life’s treasure.
Babuji took Baba upto his cottage. Then giving some necessary advises to his own servants Sri Radheshyam and Sri Ramsanehi he went into his room. All devotees also retired into their resting areas, however they were all profoundly depressed and in great agony.
* * * * * * *
A Glimpse of the Internal Life
Baba had taken up his kasth moun on the Sharad Purnima of 2013, which dates to 19.10.56. With Baba’s silence it appeared that the atmosphere of Gita Vatika has taken up a profound silence. All the dear ones, who had come from outside for the kasth moun, returned to their respective places with a heart full of deep emotions. Worshipable Babuji wrote in his letter on 27.10.56 to his own people – Almost everyone has gone back from here. …….. the garden is engulfed with silence.
These days Babuji too was not in good health. He had returned in April 56 from the three Dham pilgrimage. From then his bad health has not left him. Pain in his left hand and light fever constantly remained. Weakness and tiredness also prevailed. There was some gain with the treatment, but that would also fade. Continuous fever was not a good thing. All the doctors advised that he should take complete rest. In accordance with this advise, Babuji confined himself in solitude in his room. This solitude turned out to be most favourable to Babuji, due to which he received the golden opportunity to envision the intimate lilas of Priya Priyatam and also to take part in those intimate lilas. Family members began to say that whatever extent Babuji may remain in solitude, still so many activities other than the works of ‘Kalyan’ magazine keeps constantly coming towards him due to which he never gets any rest. Therefore, we all must go to Ratangadh so that he can get enough rest. This thought caught up strongly. And after a month of Baba’s kasth moun all went to Ratangadh from Gorakhpur.
Time to time Babuji kept posting details of Baba’s situation in both Ratangadh and Gorakhpur through his letters to his own near and dear ones. Some of the essence from those many letters are as follows – ‘Baba’s austerity of kasht moun is going on well. He neither talks to anyone, nor looks nor gives any gestures. He does not even look at anyone. No one goes where he stays. In the evening he accepts alms. Even at this time he remains silent. He does not give any signs of gestures at all, therefore we are unable to know of his comforts or discomforts. Some of the days in his begging he eats very little, and from this we derive that today Baba’s health may not be fine. Otherwise he is very happy and peaceful. The words of Srimad Bhagavad Gita that ‘nirdvandvo nitya sattvastho niryogakshema aatmavaan’ has been perfected in Baba’s life. He has no attachment to anyone, no relationships, no needs, neither any anxiety about anything’.
The above is the essence from the letters written in 1956. The letters that Babuji wrote in 1957 pictures more profound states of Baba. Essense from some of those letters are as follows – ‘These days Baba is becoming more and more detached from the external world. Many a times he is unable to do his begging and bathing on time. He remains in deep absorption. Upon waking him, he gets up. His vairagya (detachment) is increasing day by day. External consciousness is decreasing. He sits for hours without eating and bathing. He wakes up when awakened.’
These facts were re-iterated in various ways through the letters written by Babuji. Factually, these days Baba’s inwardness is getting deeper and deeper day by day.
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Mother’s Divine Consummation
Now for a short while let us go to Baba’s birth-mother at Fakharpur village in Bihar. Mother had intense desire to see the face of her sannyasi son atleast once. A plot was therefore made to fulfill this desire, but it failed. In fact, the true welfare of the mother rested within this failure. Baba’s thoughts were one-of-its-kind, aimed at mother’s absolute and eternal spiritual welfare. Few moments of meeting in this material world was an occasional temporary gain, but Baba was thinking of mother’s eternal ultimate welfare which will continue to be imperishable, perpetual, and unlimited even after this life. Not only this, it would also be a greatly significant fact that during the final moments of her life, mother will experience my close presence.
Baba’s thoughts manifested in full. Now the final moments of his mother’s life has arrived. Her body was in bad health. It was two days before her death. On Ekadasi, mother’s situation was critical. People at home felt that her life air would leave any moment. Mother was brought down from her cot to the floor. In this situation, one of them asked the mother – Are you remembering your sannyasi Babu ?
Mother, pleasantly said – Look, there he is. He is right in front of me. Look, there he is.
Whenever mother was asked about Baba, she always pointed out to his location, sometimes near, sometimes far, sometimes at her right, sometimes at her left. Mother constantly experienced that my sannyasi son is next to me, and it was true that she was seeing Baba. That pleasant faced mother began to ask her sannyasi son – You are doing well, right ? You are getting your food properly, right ?
In this way for sometime she would continue talking to her sannyasi son and then on her own she would become silent. Death was nearing every moment. In the year 2013, Poush shukla ekadasi (13-1-57), mother told her family members – Please take me to Kashi.
Baba’s big brother was greatly devoted to his mother. He would always be on his heels to meet her demands. He was greatly wishing to fulfill mother’s last desire. He was in agony that neither was there any railway station nearby nor did anyone in the village have a motorcar. Seeing his mother close to death, he was unable to think what is to be done? In situations of hopelessness, remembrance of the Lord is the only shelter. He began to remember the Lord within his mind. The next day he saw an empty motorcar passing by, near his home. He ran to the driver and asked – where is this car going?
Driver said – Kashi !!
He said – Brother, you can ask me for any amount of money, I will give you. My mother is on the verge of death. And her desire is to go to Kashi. Please, kindly take us to Kashi.
The driver agreed. Immediately, they spread a mattress at the back of the motorcar. Baba’s elder sister, who was about twenty years elder to him, sat along with mother. Pandit Devdattji carried enough money with him and sat next to the driver. Two more people sat along with them in the car. Thus total five members of the family went along with mother to Kashi. No one knew whom the motorcar belonged to, where it was coming from and how it came, but it reached by the plans of the Lord to fulfill mother’s last wish. No sooner the motor car reached the holy abode of Lord Vishwanath and the car crossed the bridge over river Ganga, entered the borders of Kashi and stopped at the cross-section, immediately mother gave up her physical body. Baba’s worshipful Mother’s death occurred in 2013 on Makar Sankranti, Poush shukla 13, Monday the 14th January 1957. It seemed that she was awaiting Lord Surya Narayan’s ascend to the North. On the day of Makar Sankranti, Lord Surya Narayan traveled from the southern hemisphere to the northern hemisphere and on this pious day at the Holy abode of Kashi, which is unique from the three worlds, she gave up her body.
Now there was not the need to stay at the Dharmashala. The body was taken to the Manikarnika ghat and placed on the pyre. The life of the children of the Rishis and Munis are greatly sacrificial for the benefit of all hindu samskars from birth to death. Even the death ceremony of the hindus is a Yajna of its kind. They are greatly fortunate, whose body is offered as oblations in the Yajnic-fire of funeral pyre on the banks of Ganga at a holy place and on a pious auspicious time. This Yajna is not performed by the parents, rather through the son. Son is the extension of the parent. In the form of the son, the parents are performing this Yajna. The Yajna of life attains its completion by the final offerings of oblations of the body into the fire of the funeral pyre. Seeing the final oblations, Sri Taradattaji sat in one corner looking at the fire consuming the body with its high raised flames. Seeing his worshipful mother turning into ashes, his heart was overwhelmed with separation from mother, and he began to cry aloud. Hugging his brother, Pandit Sri Devadattaji, he began to say – Oh Brother! Now I am bereft of my mother and father. Have I become an orphan?
Devadattaji said – Arey, You are crying? How fortunate it is to become the son of such a mother? A mother, who gave up her body on the most auspicious day of Makara Sankranti at the holy abode of Lord Sri Vishwanath’s kshetra of Kashi, a mother who continued to perform sadhu-seva and seva to mankind with enthusiasm and jubiliation, a mother whose mood of serving the husband has always been applaudable, and topmost of all – one who gave birth to the most ultimate worthy sannyasi son – such a mother is virtuous, her dynasty is virtuous, both her family lineages are virtuous and all her relatives are virtuous. May the Lord give such a mother to one and all.
Hearing the words of Pandit Sri Devadattaji, Sri Taradattaji attained great consolation. The body was only half consumed and a very special event took place. There were clouds in the sky and it began to pour. Although the rain was light, both the brothers were in anxiety. The most amazing part was that the rain had no effect on the pyre and it remained as blazing as before.
In order to give the message of mother’s passing away, Bhai sent a telegram to Baba at Ratangadh. Baba had taken up the vow of Kasth moun on 19 oct 1956. About 45 days later they had shifted from Gorakhpur to Ratangadh for the better health of worshipful Babuji. Baba too went along with them. The telegram reached Baba very late. However, prior to the reaching of the telegram, there happened another incident at Ratangadh. Baba was in his room. Around 9 or 10 in the night, Baba’s mother came and stood in front of Baba. Baba recogonized his mother and Baba was greatly surprised how she has come here! Baba asked her – How come you are here?
Standing there, mother began to smile. Her feet were not touching the ground. She was standing slightly above the earth, in the air. Seeing this, Baba instantly realized that she has given up her gross body and is right now standing in front of me in her subtle body.
After giving up her body, Baba’s mother underwent some divine transformations and within 3 days of her death she reached where she was to reach. Her first transformation was in the form of Goddess Parvati. Mother had given up her body within the borders of the holy Kashi, the abode of Lord Vishwanath, as a result of this her first transformation took place in the form of Goddess Parvati. Her second transformation took the form of the legitimate wife of Maharshi Bhaguri. The great sage Shandilya is the priest of Sri Nanda’s dynasty and the great sage Bhaguri is the family priest of Vrshabhanu’s dynasty. Baba’s father’s transformation took place in the form of Maharshi Bhaguri, therefore it is natural that mother’s transformation took place as his legitimate wife. Baba’s mother’s next transformation was to the form of Mother Kirtida. And her final transformation was in the form of Saudamini, who is the unique chandrika residing on the head of Vrshabhanu Nandini, Sri Radhika.
Soon after her death, mother appeared in her subtle body to Baba at Ratangadh. There occured an incident 3 days after this darshan. Baba was sitting in his room at Ratangadh. Both the doors of the room were locked. And a lady came into Baba’s room. Her bodily effulgence was greatly illuminating, and she was decorated with divine ornaments. Her attire appeared extra-ordinary. Seeing a lady in the solitary room, Baba was perturbed. Baba was sitting on a plank in his room facing north, and this divine lady was standing facing the east. Baba could not recognize her. Then Baba began to stare at that lady. After deeply beholding her, Baba could realize that this is my mother who gave birth to me. Immediately Baba climbed down his plank, and placing his head on the earth he offered his obeisance to his mother. Baba was feeling great happiness on the fact that my mother attained her final own-form so quickly. No sooner Baba offered his obeisance placing his head to the ground, she raised both her hands in the gesture of blessings and bestowed blessings upon him. Swaying her hands she blessed him three times. Baba said within his mind – Go mother, may you remain happy.
After this she disappeared. She then never came to Baba’s vision.

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Mahabhav Initiation
Four incidents are greatly significant in Baba’s life in view of his passing through the ocean of mellows. Firstly, his initiation into Sri Manjulila bhav, that was bestowed upon him in 1939 by his Guru-sakhi Sri Rupa Manjari-ji. Secondly, his initiation into Sri Manjushyama, that was bestowed upon him by Priya-Priyatam Sri Radhakrishna in 1943. Thirdly, the secret initiation into the Devi-mantra, that was bestowed upon him by Goddess Sriman Maha Tripura Sundari in the year 1949. And fourthly, his initiation into Sri Radha bhav, that was bestowed upon him by Priyatam Sri Krsna Himself in 1957. In 1956, Sharad Purnima, Baba took up his kasht moun and he became deeply inward, a faint glimpse of which has already been presented above.
This is about an event at Ratangadh in the year 1957, in the month of Chaitra. The ashtami day was getting over and the navami day was to begin. The mahabhav initiation into Sri Radha svarup occurred at the conjoint of these two days. Baba was situated in one of his divine forms in the lila-kingdom, when this great fortune dawned upon him. Baba has himself accepted this truth in his poem ‘Jay Jay Priyatam’. In the beginning of the first stanza of this poem ‘Jay Jay Priyatam’, Baba has given an introduction of his bhav-svarup as below :-
I am the very one, to whom you said ‘Queen of my life’, Hey Priyatam
Those hands that you had held, decorated with Mehandi, Hey Priyatam
Sort of wrecked was that house in which the young girl lived, Priyatam
Completely engulfed with darkness was the night, when you came, Hey Priyatam
Residing in that crude house, still serene was, that young girl, Priyatam
Couldn’t touch her, a single particle from outside that came, Priyatam
Was hidden in her, the strength of a thousand agiyari trees (fire-trees), Hey Priyatam
Capable was no one, anywhere, to contaminate her, Priyatam

In these verses Baba, indicating his divine form, his divine sringar, his divine purity, his divine strength, has given clear reference to that transcendental pure relationship and to his most dear salutations, when that great fortune dawned upon him in the month of Chaitra-sukla paksh at the time of the conjunction of the eighth-ninth day.
Once, a great inquisitiveness awoke within the mind of mother to ask Baba about his own original eternal form. One day while engaging him in accepting alms, mother asked Baba – Tell me, who are you?
Due to the vow of kasth moun, Baba could not say anything. Baba had only taken the exemption of meeting eye to eye with mother. The severe austerity of kasht moun went on for six years and during this period up to three years Baba did not meet eye to eye even with Bai (Sri Savitri Bai Phogla). No sooner mother asked the question, though Baba did not say anything for that moment, however still, the answer arose within his mind. Baba even framed that answer into a meteric verse. In the future, one day Baba sang that verse and explaining its meaning he said – The blue outer body of Sri Krsna is me, and my golden outer body is Sri Krsna.
In this verse, there is a line which means that – I am a sweet dream of Sri Krsna’s heart. Explaining this, Baba said that the sweet dream of Vrajendra Nandan Sri Krsna is Sri Radha, and I am that Sri Radha. This line means that Sri Krsna’s heart is Sri Radha, and I am a sweet dream of that Sri Radha.

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Baba has personally described about his extraordinary school and his extraordinary teaching process in ‘Radha-Sandesh’, in view of the state of Mahabhav and the various experiences that he had attained. Baba’s title of ‘Radha-Sandesh’, a heart rendering description, has been published in the book ‘Chalo Ri Aaj Vrajraj Mukh Nirakhiye’. And this prose composition is the detailed explanation of the eleventh section of the poem ‘Jay Jay Priyatam’. One whose life is only of crying , and in whose life there never seems an end to that unlimited crying, that Krsna Vallabhaa Sri Radha tells her Priyatam’s dear messenger, Sri Uddhavji –
“Listen, will you learn that art? Look, there is a school on my chest. I do not know when this school got built. But I have been studying there from when, I don’t know and till today I am still studying there. The name of that school is – ‘Love School’. So I was studying in that school, and I am still studying, and the first lesson of that school is – To recite the alphabetical series and then write the alphabets. Look! But I will tell you only one name for those alphabet series. Listen – ‘Krsna’ – by constantly reciting this character, all the rest of the complete alphabetical series will be known to you. And then, you continue to inscribe the shape and color of those alphabets in your heart. I only do this. And I had been doing this only.
Look! In the inner sanctum of that character ‘Krsna’ you will see twenty reddish ruby like nails. No sooner you concentrate your attention on it, a new hue of orange color will manifest – where, how, you will understand it yourself. After this you will see a yellow color. Then, within this a green color will manifest. Do not get exhausted as you keep writing. Then you will see a sky-color, indigo-blue color and violet color – all these will manifest. With an unceasing mood continue chanting ‘Krsna-Krsna’ and continue to construct the shape of these alphabets. However, Attention! Not with chalk, for this, drops of tears from within your inner core will arise. Glass like round drops of tears will keep manifesting and you will keep writing those characters. Knowledge of letters will come to you within this itself. Then you will understand that the rays of the sun manifest the shades of the shades of these characters. When you will become aware of letters, at that time you know, the substance of the entire material existence will disappear from your sight. One Truth, one knowledge, one bliss – one complete Truth, one complete knowledge, one complete bliss – you must have heard of this sometime, isn’t it ? That you will attain in more than what you pay for.
Now listen further – one who becomes aware of the letters, who has learnt the alphabet series, then he begins to write words. Do you know, one word of shadaj will arise, one rushabh, one gandhar, one madhyam, one pancham, one dhaivat and one nishad. But this word-series is the shade of the shade of that word. But for those words there is no name at all. Hey Messenger, what do I say? The way I understood, the lesson I learnt, the same, in the same manner you should understand, therefore I am saying all this. In the flow of time, when, how, and how much I myself have taken shelter of this procedure, I don’t know, Messenger!
Now within this you will come to realize conjunctive words. These conjunctive words are very simple, Messenger! Then as you go ahead, the lessons related to special goal-oriented feelings will begin. However, the meanings of those lessons are so deep, that you will not be able to know. Those deep meanings of that lesson will remain unknown. After this, for some days you continue to keep expecting.
What will happen after this, shall I tell you? One is the knowledge of mahabhav, which you have not learnt till today. Messenger! How that knowledge is, shall I tell you? Fine, listen! No one has been able to explore the cause of the appearance of that knowledge. It is extremely subtle. There is not the slightest smell of the smell of dirt – that knowledge of mahabhav is so pure, and it increases every moment. And there is no trace of any depletion. It is constant at all times. It has no limits. Till today no one has been able to cross over it. And look! Words cannot even touch it. At all times, in all parts, it is self educating. It is greatly profound. Even to say ‘atha’(now begins) of that great knowledge, is dependent on the drop from the stream of this vishuddha sattva. Touching that very ‘atha’ you will proceed.
What comes after this – this no one can say. And the truth is that whoever has gone ahead and submerged in this, such a person never returns.

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The above lines are an extract from ‘Radha-Sandesh’. Within these lines, the description of that love-school, its lessons, its procedures and its ultimate attainment are greatly conventional and mysterious. In this narration, there is a description of seven colors and the names of seven sounds. Inspite of repeated readings, when even the slightest understanding was not attained, then at one time Baba was asked – Baba! What message is being said here through the medium of explanations of the seven colors?
Baba said – By the plea of those descriptions I have given an indicative description of my experiences. There I have mentioned all that has occurred in my life in the manner that they have occurred, but it is said in a covered way. That, which has occurred in my life, has its descriptions in the shastras. However that which occurred in my life, is not in accordance to the sequential order mentioned in the shastras and also not in accordance to the steps of the conclusions given by those who have deep insights into ras (mellows). As a result of the mercy of the Lord, from the very beginning I was established at the topmost stages. It is true that, the only main cause for me being established in that highest stage is solely the mercy of the Lord. But in the descriptions of those words, is the substance of my experiences. This fact is now separate that, in my life those different stepping stones and revelations of those different stages continued to take place later at different times. In the development of love for Krsna, shastras describe sneh, maan, pranay, raag, anuraag, bhav and mahabhav. These have been expressed here through the media of different colors. The white rays of the sun have seven colors that can be seen in the rainbow or in the water bubbles or in the prism. These seven colors combine in one ray of the sunlight to form a white color, spreading the topmost illuminating brightness, by which the entire world is beheld. Sri Radha, the enjoyer of transcendental pastimes, the daughter of Sun God, and the worshipper of the Sun, is also the great splendor of that supremely transcendental kingdom of mellows. She is eternally adorned with her matchless-transcendental greatness. She is the principle foundation and nourisher of the seven mellows (bhavs). Amongst the group of seven mellows she is the embodiment of the ultimate topmost level of mahabhav, whose total existence is completely devoid of any impurity, and who is the personification of complete splendor. One more fact, these seven mellows have been compared to the seven colors, but this comparison is also unfit. In our material world, the seven colors in the rays of the sun are so separate, that one color does not exist in the other. However, in that transcendental kingdom of mellows, all the seven mellows exist within each other, always. Only the one, who chants the name of Sri Krsna by constantly drenching it with one’s tears, can move towards that kingdom of bhav. As he chants he becomes completely aware of that ultimate Truth which is beyond the influence of time, beyond the three modes, which is indestructible and imperishable; and he attains the greatest fortune of the auspicious-darshan of those twenty ruby like nails of Sri Priya Priyatam. The highest bliss that the Brahm-Jnanis attain after undergoing severe sadhana, that highest bliss he easily experiences without any difficulty. Then he constantly sings with those seven svars, the nectarine pastimes which are filled and nourished by the seven bhavs. And in the end, he is submerged in the ocean of mahabhav. This is the supreme exalted science of this Love-school. One, who has drowned in the ocean of mahabhav, never returns to this material world. In Srimad Bhagavatam, eleventh canto, 11.16.37, Lord Krsna tells Uddhavji – Where there is no mode of goodness (sattva), no mode of passion (rajas) and no mode of ignorance (tamas), that nirgun or pure goodness is Me. By all means it is greatly difficult to attain this stage of pure goodness in a human body. Now the tribute to this extraordinary love is that – drifting in this, Lord Sri Krsna has altered his rules and has established me in this stage of pure goodness. Seeing this inconceivable-immeasurable love of His, a stanza has outpoured from my mouth –
Niyam hutou gun deh me mahabhav nahi hon
Mere sukh hit saanvaro so-u kinou goun
(Meaning – The rule is that within this body that is influenced by the three modes, mahabhav does not take place, but for my sake, O Sanvaro, you have reformed it.)
The description of mahabhav stage is available only in the Vaishnav scriptures. Followers of impersonalism (nirgun-niraakar) cannot even imagine of this stage. This has been defined by Sri Poddhar Maharaj as ‘Jnanottarabhavrajya’ or ‘Kingdom of mellows beyond knowledge’. Thus, the meanings of the word-descriptions is that – only after the chanting of names of Sri Krsna in bhav and after the development of true love for Sri Krsna, does the journey of bhav-sadhana begins. And the ultimate end of this journey is immersion into mahabhav.
The above said is the essence of the explanation given by Baba on the teaching procedures of that love-school.

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The auspicious beginning of Baba’s absorption in ras was in the sentiments of svadhina-bhartrka. When a Priyatam, becoming subservient to his beloved, always remains in close proximity, then the beloved is called Svadhina-Bhartrka Nayika (or the heroine in the mood of svadhina bhartrka). Sri Vishakha is the personification of the mellow of svadhina bhartrka. And Baba’s entrance into the Kingdom of mellows was in the sentiments of Sri Vishakha. Sri Radha only is Sri Vishakha. Sri Radha always forgets her own-form as Sri Radha, and she begins to consider herself as the complete form of Sri Vishakha. By the strength of her loving sentiments, she begins to think and consider like this that – I am not Vrshabhanu Nandini Radha, but I am Vishakha. In actuality she begins to experience this from her heart. When this Vishakha-sentiment becomes deeper, she begins to consider herself as Madhumati. And when the sentiments become even more deeper, she begins to consider herself as Chandan Manjari. As the sentiments grow more and more dense, from Chandan Manjari she begins to consider herself as Shashirekha Manjari, and then from Shashirekha to Haarhira manjari. As the waves of the mellows becomes denser, such transformations continue to be ever increasing.
Attaining ever increasing elevations, Baba thus experienced these six waves of the mellows of svadhina bhartrka bhav. In the kingdom of lilas, Baba also experienced that it is the ‘lubricity’ of Sri Radha’s thick volume of hair that has taken up the sakhi form of Sri Vishakha, who is submerged in the nikunj seva of the Divine Couple. Sri Vishakha-ji is herself Sri Radha and the personification of the lubricity of Sri Radha’s hair. She is both the whole and the part. In that transcendental lila-kingdom, there are no differences between the whole and the part. The part is also complete like the whole. Similarly, all the sakhis and manjaris, who are constantly immersed in the delightful services of the mellow-relishing Divine Couple, are the various forms of Sri Radha and they are the personification of Sri Radha’s limbs, ornaments etc. Sri Radha, the eternal Queen of the bowers, is the personification of mahabhav. And this ocean of mahabhav is constantly gushing with waves to give pleasure to Sri Krsna, the Lord of the bowers. Within this ever plunging ocean of mahabhav, various waves of sentiments – high and low, big and small – are constantly rising. However the eight waves of sentiments arising from the eight directions are the most important. And one among these eight is the wave of svadhina bhartrka bhav, whose rising-sport occurs in the direction of North-East. The ever-rising waves of the mellows of svadhina bhartrka (its form, its name, its attributes) as well as the attributes of the location of Vishakha Kunj, the vegetations of this kunj, the love sports of this kunj etc are all the internal truths of Baba’s own pastime-kingdom.
Similarly, in the Northern direction of that ocean of mahabhav, when the waves of khandita bhav begin to ripple, at that time Sri Radha arises as the personification form of Sri Lalitaji. According to the divine experiences of Baba, it is the ‘rosiness’ of Sri Radha’s red lips that becomes the personification of Sri Lalita Sakhi, who remains constantly immersed in the service of the Divine Couple. The ever increasing, pleasure- giving six waves of the khandita bhav also ripples in the ocean of mahabhav and their names are – Lalita, Manjushyama, Rupa Manjari, Lavanga Manjari, Modini Manjari and Madhavi Manjari.
Like the svadhina bhartrka bhav and the khandita bhav, there are also divabhisarika bhav, proshita bhartrka bhav, vasaka sajja bhav, utkanthita bhav, vipralabdha bhav and kalahantarita bhav whose divine waves ripple on that ocean of mahabhav in the directions of east, south-east, south, south-west, west and north-west respectively. And the personifications of these waves of mellows are Sri Chitra-ji, Sri Indulekha-ji, Sri Champakalata-ji, Sri Rangadevi-ji, Sri Tungavidya-ji and Sri Sudevi-ji respectively. The ever dense waves of these bhavs ripple in their own directions. And each bhav has their six waves with different names. These eight bhavs, each with six waves, thus leads to 48 waves, and one common wave, leads to 49 waves, the discussion of which is itself a splendid topic. Only a glimpse of all this is being described here. However, the truth is that these facts of lila-kingdom are Baba’s own accomplishments and a great gift of the period of kasht moun.
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At one stage, in these bhav-experiences Baba has a little difference in opinion from the previous acaryas. In the ras-scriptures, it is being said that an utkanthita-heroine is a girl who – upon the failure of the arrival of her offenseless priyatam – greatly longs to meet him; and, vipralabdha-heroine is a girl who – upon the providential failure of her priyatam who has received the indications of the meeting place – becomes tormented with internal grief. Both the utkanthita heroine and the vipralabdha heroine are awaiting the arrival of the priyatam due to which both exhibit weeping, anxiety, various arguments and speculations. However, in the expectations of the utkanthita-heroine, the desire of meeting is in complete fullness ; whereas in vipralabdha-heroine, the desire of meeting is diminishing. In vipralabdha-heroine, the desire to meet the priyatam is towards the end and so her heart is full of indifference, regret etc and in extreme degrees of distress, she faints. In the ras-scriptures, Sri Rangadevi-ji is considered as the personification of utkanthita-bhav. However, during the period of kasht moun, Baba’s experiences were different. The point of confluence of the sentiments of utkanthita-heroine and vipralabdha-heroine, that point’s personified form is Sri Rangadeviji. That expectation, where the point of complete hopes and the point of complete hopelessness are touching each other, the personified form of that wonderful state of bhav is Sri Rangadevi-ji. It is for this reason that the leaves of the creepers and plants (Malati – Juhi) etc of Sri Rangadevi’s kunj are greatly fluttering. In relation to this amazing truth of his personal pastime experiences, Baba used to say that – this is a greatly peculiar state of bhav and as a result of this peculiarity, I was unable to give any new name to that state of bhav. Baba could not get an appropriate word that could be used as the name for that state of bhav. Baba also told that as a result of this peculiar state of bhav, many acharyas have accepted Sri Rangadevi-ji as the most important sakhi. The great musician, Sri Hari Vyasdevji has paid his foremost remembrance and prayers to Sri Rangadevji only.

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The Three Month Long Sunday
Every year, the month of Bhadra brought Baba a very unique flood of bhav. Every month of the year is connected to a particular pastime of the Lord, as a result of which, it gives rise to stimulants. However, the month of Bhadra stimulated Baba’s bhav in a very special way. Baba’s kingdom of bhav and its sweet pastimes were in actuality very wonderful. The month of Bhadra was especially significant due to the festivals of Krsna’s birth that comes in the waning moon and Radha’s birth in the waxing period. The festival of Krsna’s birth is celebrated in the waning period at Nandagaon, but Nandraiji does not celebrate it. At the beginning of the waning period, Sri Vrshabhanuji comes to Nandagaon from Barsana along with his entire near and dear ones, and with inconceivable enthusiasm they make all the arrangements for the festival and the festival of Sri Krsna’s birth is conducted for the entire period. Similarly, during the beginning of the waxing period, Sri Nandraiji comes to Barsana from Nandagaon with his entire family-servants-associates and celebrates Sri Radha’s birth with inconceivable zeal. The ways of love are strange. Therefore in Nandagaon and Barsana, Sri Nandraiji and Sri Vrshabhanuji have the sentiments of competition in giving pleasure to one another and in all their activities for each other.
An incident of the year 2014 (i.e. 1957) – Babuji and Baba were at Ratangadh and Radhashtami festival was being celebrated in Ratangadh. This Radhashtami fell on 1st September 1957 on a Sunday. For us ordinary living beings, the Sunday began from the sunrise on Sunday and ended the next sunrise, however for Baba this Sunday lasted for three months. For us the sunrise of Sunday concluded with the sunrise of Monday, but Baba’s sunrise of Sunday did not set for three months. From the material point of view, Baba was existing in this world and all his bodily deeds were going on automatically, but he was not in this body. In actuality, for three months he was swimming in the divine pastime of Radha’s birth festival. In Sri Ramcharita Manas, Goswami Sri Tulasidasji has written that at Lord Sri Ramchandraji’s time of appearance ‘mas divas kar divas bha maram na jaanayi hoi’ (the day was like a month, no one realized the passage of the day); but here one day became equal to three months.
For three months, Baba continued to see the festival of Sri Radha’s birth, which in the divine kingdom of pastimes was celebrated for just one day, on Sunday. At the arrival of the 8th day of the Bhadra waxing period, Priyatam Sri Krsna told Baba, “Priyatame Radhe, Just look! Today in Vrshabhanupur your annual auspicious birth-celebration is taking place. Aha! What a beautiful sight of pleasure it is.”
And Baba was seeing the birth festival with Priyatam Sri Krsna. How strange it is of seeing one’s own festival through one’s own vision, seeing with one body and visible with other body. On Sunday when the festival was being celebrated in the mansion at Ratangadh, Babuji brought Baba to the festival and Baba was sitting in the festival; but was he there? Although with his body he was seated in the midst of the festival, in actuality he was with his Priyatam in that divine lila-kingdom as a spectator. Days passed by; but he didn’t realize when the sun and moon rose and set. For three months Baba’s external consciousness remained very meager. Activities such as toilet-bath-alms etc were accomplished automatically. Baba’s vision of this birth-festival is described in ‘Kishori Ki Svapna Vilas’ and this description has been published in ‘Chalo Ri Aaj Vrajraaj Mukh Nirakhiye’.

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The Divine Attainment of Mantras for Service of Relish
It is foresaid above that the Radhashtami of the year 1957 was on a Sunday. For Baba, this Sunday of the month of Bhadra shukla period lasted for three months. A pastime in this period occurred that is very unique by all means. Through this pastime Baba received the divine mantras for his rasopasana (service of relish).
Baba narrated a symbolic description of this divine attainment to Sri Maharajji. This relishing conversation between the two took place on 10th October 1976 and this discussion went on for about one to one-and-half hour. A concise portion of this relishing discussion as-it-is, is being given below –
Pointing out to the obstacles that arises on the path of getting drenched with relish, Baba told Sri Maharajji – There is a big fault in that King of relish, Rasraaj Sri Krsna. He does not like cunningness and he does not like outsiders. Sri Krsna is restless to drown anyone into ras, but he will drown the one in whom there is no cunningness. One who carries cunningness or is even slightly attracted to even a particle of cunningness or in whose life any object or person other than Sri Priya-Priyatam is of some or great importance, such a person is unable to drown. Otherwise, this ocean of mellows is easy to attain and is approachable by all.
Pausing a little, Baba said – “Somehow or the other just come to the shore of the ocean. One day or the other, the waves of that ocean will carry you away. During our pilgrimage, we had gone to a place called Vedaranyam. This is a village on the shore of the ocean. The people there said that prior to three or four months, three terrifying waves came. At first it poured all day long. Then one such wave came that reached higher than the roofs of the railway station. It washed away the people of the village as well as the people and the animals of the nearby realms. A second wave came, which was higher than the first, which created more destruction. A third wave higher than the second came, which was massive, that uprooted even the huge trees, what to say of smaller trees? In all four directions was annihilation; everywhere was the thandava dance of destruction. Water remained for many days. All traffics came to a standstill. Hearing this, it came into my mind that when such a wave that can wash away everything can come in this material world, then one day one such massive wave of the ocean of mahabhav will also come, that will wash away the person standing on its shore and will drown him into the ocean. However, this much requirement has to be there that one ought to come to the shore, one continues to stand at the shore of the ocean”.
Citing his own example Baba began to say – Earlier I used to say ‘Shivoham’ ‘Shivoham’. I was a fanatic follower of this, but a transformation happened and in one second everything changed.
Hearing this Sri Maharajji, full of relish and sentiments humorously said – Now it is ‘Saaham’. ‘Saaham’.
This humor rejoiced Baba, he was carried away and he began to say – There is one pastime on this. It is related to the flow of bhav to that which you have said just now. This pastime manifests the sentiments of Sri Krsna and Sri Radha. Sri Radhaji says ‘Sri Krsnoham’, ‘Soham’ and Sri Krsna says ‘Radhaaham’, ‘Saaham’. Priyatam Sri Krsna, prior to performing the relishing worship of Praneshvari Sri Radha with ras-mantras and articles, says, remembering her transcendental form –
Alak-drganchal-lalitam, rang-tarang-salilitam
Samvid-gagan-samuditam, bhaja mukha-vidhumakalushitam
Similarly Priyatamaa Sri Radha, prior to performing the relishing worship of Pranavallabh Sri Krsna with ras-mantras and articles, says, remembering his transcendental form –
Nila-saroruha-varanam, niyuta-ramaamati-haranam
Smara-virahodadhi-taranam, mukhamarbuda-rati-sharanam
This relishing worship of one another results in a transformation into each other’s form and Sri Radhaji says ‘Sri Krsnoham’ ‘Sri Krsnoham’ and Sri Krsna says ‘Sri Radhaaham’ ‘Sri Radhaaham’. I attained the rasa-mantras for this ras-worship in an inconceivable and transcendental manner. It is only auspicious to keep it unspoken.
Sri Maharajji only made a sentimental humor by saying ‘saaham’, however through this humor a great truth was revealed. Hearing this description, Maharajji’s heart was inundated with bliss.
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Love-Quarrel With Priyatam
Once, Baba had a love-quarrel with Priyatam. This happened in relation to Putana and Kaikeyi. Putana and Kaikeyi both were not real mothers. One made a farce of motherhood and other was circumstantially a step-mother. But both were in the position of mother. Baba, who always had reverence to bosom and bosom’s milk – be they of anyone and however the milk may be, reproached Priyatam Sri Krsna – “What sort of supreme act have you shown by taking away the life of the one who came to you as a mother? I agree that she was a deceitful mother and that she had made a farce of motherhood, but this much is true that she gave her breast into your mouth with the sentiments of motherhood, and then to take away the life of that mother – is this the most supreme act?”
Priyatam Sri Krsna asked – What was appropriate for me to have done?
Baba said – “No sooner Putana took the baby onto her lap, merely by the touch of the baby, all divine sentiments should have flowed through her. Simply by touching she should have been in transcendental madness by which she would not have even remembered to feed her breast. She would have been in this divine madness all her entire life, and in Mathura Kans would have received this message that the Putana who went to kill the child has become transcendentally mad. This should have been the result of your touch”.
Priyatam Sri Krsna said – Praneshvari! In another era this pastime will also take place.
Then Baba said about Kaikeyi – “Mother Kaikeyi loved you more than her own son, Bharat. Kaikeyi’s affection towards Ram is world famous. Seeing Kaikeyi’s love for Ram even Koushalya would become astounded and because of Kaikeyi she was anxious-free for Ram. Such a mother Kaikeyi who was so greatly affectionate, was smutted to such an extent that birth after birth, era after era, she has become disgraced. She has become unqualified to show her face to anyone. She has fallen so much from the eyes of the world that no one will ever name their daughter by the name ‘Kaikeyi’. The one who gave you her life’s purest love, that personification of renouncement has been defamed as the personification of impurity and the chamber of grudge. Is this applaudable?”
To this Priyatam Sri Krsna said – “The whole world dies for fame. However, Mother Kaikeyi’s part is by all means incomparable. Mother Kaikeyi’s affection is so great that inorder to keep up the mind’s desire of her object of affection (Ram), she sacrificed even her own fame. Only if the world praises her will she become great? Though the ordinary beings of this world may have not known her, and even after knowing may have failed to understand her, but she, naturally by her own fame, has forever become famous. ‘How one could fully sacrifice one’s own fame with full honesty inorder to fulfill the beloved desire of one’s beloved’ – The topmost supreme example for this is Mother Kaikeyi. The depth of the renouncement of Mother Kaikeyi is by all means indescribable and inconceivable forever.”
Hearing the words of Priyatam Sri Krsna, Baba became silent. Baba accepted it in his mind that Priyatam Sri Krsna is right.
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During this period of kasth moun, Baba had the vision of parrot-pastime (keer-lila). In this pastime, there is the sigh of incessant tears of the heart. There, Priyatam Sri Krsna has gone from Mathura to Dwaraka, and here in Vraj, Vrshabhanu Nandini Sri Radha is in great pain of separation. The pain of separation of Sri Priya would reflect in the heart of Priyatam Sri Krsna who is stationed in Dwaraka, and he sends his love message through his own parrot. Other than the parrot, there is no one who could carry these heartstrings till there. For the parrot, even a moment’s separation from the Lord of his life was impossible. What Vraj, what Mathura and what Dwaraka, he always remained together, but now it was also impossible to disobey the orders of his life’s all and all. No sooner he is separated from his life’s wealth, he gives up his gross body and still, in order to obey the orders of his Lord, he reaches Vraj in his subtle body. Vrshabhanu Nandini Sri Radha recognizes her Pran-Priyatam’s eternal servant-associate, the parrot. And knowing the secret behind his subtle body she becomes greatly anguished.
Similar to ‘Radha Sandesh’ and ‘Chatak Sandesh’, when Baba began to consider in his mind about writing on ‘Keer Sandesh’, Pran-Priyatam Sri Krsna controlled him a bit because people of this world will not be able to accept the purity of those deep and intimate sentiments. Based on this indication, many topics of the parrot-pastime has been constricted.
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Mellow-Filled, Out of The World Incidents
On April 1958 Babuji had to come from Ratangadh to Gorakhpur as per the desire of the worshipful Sri Sethji. Those days Baba’s inwardness was at its peaks. So that there would be no obstacles in Baba’s solitude, Babuji got an enclosure to Baba’s kutir with a wall of bricks. This enclosure was to be about 7 feet tall. With this enclosure the possibilities of interference was greatly diminished. Seeing Baba’s state of bhav taking its course, it was necessary to construct this enclosure. Only Bhagatji and Ramsanehji would go through the enclosure, that too to provide the timely services. None other than Babuji, Mother and Bai were allowed to enter into the enclosure. Only those whom Babuji would take along with him for darshan could go. Bai would go in the afternoon to make him drink water and Mother would go at sunset to make him accept alms. Babuji too would go to Baba, but he would always respect Baba’s interest. Babuji never endeavored for Baba to talk to him. Baba would come out of the enclosure to use the toilet, but his vision would be fixed to the ground. Close to Baba’s enclosure was the kutir of Sri Mothiji Maharaj in front of which was a tin shed. Many people would sit under this small tin shed awaiting Baba to come out for his toilet and thus awaiting his auspicious darshan. Baba’s vision would never fall upon the people waiting there. He would come out of the enclosure and proceed straight to the washroom. He never knew how many people were waiting, who they were and why they were there.
Those who envision the intimate pastimes and who are engaged in serving in those pastimes have no time to lift their vision towards this material manifestation. In the most intimate pastimes within the inner groves, only Sri Priya Priyatam is present; and there are the Sakhis and Manjaris who are engaged in the constant service of the Divine Couple. Being constantly immersed in the divine pastimes of the groves and bowers and constantly in the divine presence of the sakhis and manjaris, Baba would feel it very strange to even look at a male. While going to the washroom, if Baba’s vision would accidentally lift up and by coincidence if he would see a male with moustache and beard, then Baba would think in his mind – Where am I? What is all this that I am seeing? Where did this man come from? Which country am I in?
Baba would feel very strange with the form-nature-attire of the men of this material manifestation. Baba would have the darshan of Priyatam’s cowherd boy friends at the banks of Yamuna, around Giriraj, in the forests and gardens, but they wore very pretty clothes, their face shapes were very beautiful, and so it was very natural that Baba would feel awkward seeing other sights in place of such pretty attires and forms.
Once, Baba was sitting in an open place within his Kutir’s enclosure. Clouds filled up the sky and it began to pour. Baba never realized when the clouds gathered in the sky and when it began to pour. Where is the awareness of the body in the absorption that rises out of swimming in the waves of bhav? The mind that is constantly immersed in Sri Priya Priyatam’s and sakhi-manjari’s ‘glance, speech, union, love, mutual laughter’ has given up the external world.
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Once, Baba was travelling with Babuji by train. Baba was sitting or lying on his berth. Babuji felt that he should ask Baba if he would like to drink water. Babuji went to Baba and said – Ei Baba ! Ei Baba ! Ei Baba ! Please drink water.
After a long time, Baba became outward and looked at Babuji. His eyes were half open, void filled his vision, and his face displayed that the mind was elsewhere. Baba slightly nodded his head indicating that he does not desire to have water. Baba was in some other world.
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Krsnaji said one more incident of the train –
Baba and Babuji were travelling in the first class compartment. Baba was lying in the upper berth. Baba felt the urge to urinate. The urge was so strong that there were chances of clothes getting spoilt. Baba desired to come down, but due to his deep inwardness, he was unable to trace how to get down. As moments passed by, his complications kept increasing. On one side the intensity of the urge and on the other side the confusion. Entangled in this situation Baba was bewildered on what to do. Krishnaji too was in the same compartment. By some inconceivable inspiration, the thought to take care of Baba cropped up in Krishnaji’s mind. He was sitting below and immediately stood up. Krishnaji said – Baba! What is the matter? Do you want to go to the washroom?
Baba was silent, but Krishnaji had inferred and he told Baba – You please come down from here like this.
By Krishnaji’s standing up, the issue was taken care.
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Once, Baba and Babuji had gone to Svargashram. Being summer, it was extremely hot. Baba was staying in his kutir and fully engrossed in his own spirits. He was not aware of the world; and flowing in the waves of bhav he was humming. Baba had not had water from morning; therefore Mother went to feed him water. Mother knocked on the door and called out too, but there was no reply from inside. Had Baba been in this material world he would have replied. When he was not even aware of his own body, how would he know of mother’s arrival! Mother waited for some time, but when the door failed to open, Mother thought to herself – Now Baba is in his own spirits. It is not right to create disturbances. I will come a little later to feed him water.
Mother returned. Although she returned, her mind was constantly remembering that Baba has not had water. A little later, Mother went again. Yet again she had to return unsuccessful. When she had to return back a third and a fourth time, she was greatly worried and indicated the situation to Babuji. Babuji immediately went near Baba’s kutir. He neither knocked nor called out. Rather he stood there keeping his ear on the door. He stood there for a long time listening to the musical notes of his humming. Then Babuji himself opened the door of the kutir and went in. He went in with an emotional heart and eyes filled with tears. Hearing those musical notes even Babuji’s mind had began to flow in the waves of bhav.
Babuji went near Baba and folding both his hands and waving them he said very sweetly, full of love – Baba! Please drink some water.
And then Babuji made Baba drink the water. With this, Mother became delighted.
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Every individual remained enthusiastic to have darshan of Baba and to offer him obeisance. After accepting kasth moun, Baba was in such deep inwardness for two-three years that Babuji never allowed anyone near Baba. And a Banarasi Barber would go into the kutir inorder to shave Baba’s head. When he would come out of the kutir after shaving the entire head, there were countless number of great personalities offering their obeisance to the Banarasi Barber by keeping their heads on his feet, and they would say within their mind – How fortunate he is that he is able to touch this Baba who is immersed in mahabhav!
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The lesser the amount of people in the place and the lesser the noise in the atmosphere, the more favorable it is for Baba. Therefore, Babuji has ordered that no one should go near the kutir and no one should make any noise there. Due to such a strict order, the atmosphere around the kutir was very peaceful.
Once it so happened, Sri Thakurji was walking past Baba’s kutir towards his own kutir. Those days Thakurji’s kutir was just behind Baba’s. As he walking by the pathway, he was in his own spirits singing a poem of Swami Sri Haridasji Maharaj. The poem is as follows –
Tu ris chadi ri radhe radhe.
Jyon jyon took gaharu tyon tyon moko bitha ri sadhe sadhe
Pranani ko poshat hain ri tere bachan suniyat aadhe aadhe
Sri haridas ke swami syama teri priti baandhe baandhe
Thakurji was not just humming; rather he was singing them loud. Singing this, he reached his kutir. Even after reaching he continued singing. Now he began to sing in his own spirits. Due to the quiet and secluded atmosphere, he began to sing even more loudly. Thakurji forgot his own self. Engrossed in the ascending and descending recitals and the modulations of the notes he was not aware of the time. He continued singing this poem for about one to one-and-half hour.
In the meantime, Babuji came to Baba. It was mid-noon. It seemed that due to some reason Bai did not come to feed water, therefore Babuji came. Babuji gently opened the door of the enclosure. The sight that he saw left him amazed. There is a lychee tree within the enclosure in front of the kutir. Baba was standing holding one of the branches with both his hands. He seemed to be hanging and swaying in his own spirits. It appeared that he was holding the branch and swinging. Babuji entered into the enclosure and closing the door, stood there for a long time watching Baba’s jolly spirits. Baba did not become aware of Babuji’s entrance and observance. Babuji stood there for a very long time. Then Babuji addressed Baba. Hearing Babuji’s sound, Baba looked back and instantly sat down on the ground. He made Babuji too sit there and began to say – “I don’t know how it has so happened that today Thakur was singing the song of the bhav that I was flowing in. My mind was drowned in the waves of the mellows of maan (sulkiness or loving-anger). Thakur was singing the song which had the bhav of the persuasions and pleadings that the eternal Nikunjeshwar Sri Krsna does inorder to pacify the sulkiness of the eternal Nikunjeshwari Sri Radha-kishori. How does this Thakur know what my state of mellow is, still he sang the poem that was in concordance to the state of my mind. Today I received great pleasure by his singing.”
Hearing this, Babuji too became greatly pleased. Babuji made Baba drink water and in those solitary moments they discussed on maan for a long time.
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Once inside the enclosure, Baba was so obsessed in bhav that he continued to sing just one word ‘tum’ (‘you’) repeatedly for a long time. For a very long time in that solitude he was in the lila of singing ‘you-you-you-you-you-you-you-you’ incessantly along with unrestrained dancing. In that absolute seclusion, neither was anyone watching him nor was there any trace of display-mood within Baba. This uprising of bhav was the natural result of a perceived pastime. It was the swing pastime of Sri Priya-Priyatam in seclusion. There is a swing on the Kadamba tree and Sri Priya-Priyatam were swinging on it. As they swing, Sri Priyaji begins to see in every leaf of the kadamba tree the sight of Sri Priya-Priyatam swinging. Seeing this vision, Sri Priyaji is bewildered. She began to think – are we the truth or is the Priya-Priyatam seen on the leaves true. She was greatly overwhelmed with this bewilderment. At this moment shuk (male parrot) and sarika (female parrot) manifested from the lotus feet of Sri Priya-Priyatam and they begin to sing pointing to the truth ‘you-you-you-you’. Hearing the song of shuk-sarika, Baba stepping out of the bed began to sing and dance.
When Baba was describing this pastime to us, he began to sing ‘you-you-you-you’. Reciting it sometimes fast, sometimes slow and sometimes sweet, Baba showed us a sweet glimpse of that nikunj-lila which was so overwhelming.
Similarly, once Baba continued to sing ‘niya-kappa-piya-kappa’. ‘niya-kappa’ – means ‘nila-kapada’ or blue cloth and ‘piya-kappa’ – means ‘pila-kapada’ or yellow cloth. Baba’s mind was so overwhelmed with Sri Priya-Priyatam’s blue and golden attires that Baba began to sing a song on those attires. This is very natural. Those clothes, being a part of that transcendental kingdom, are also divine and transcendental. It was not just for a short while; rather this song went on for many hours. Baba would sometimes sit on his seat, sometimes lie down and sometimes stand. There was no limit to his frolic. It was one of its own kind. One who sees it would say – is this person mad? The reality is that for an ordinary person of this material world, it is far beyond his capacity to understand. They cannot even imagine when the ocean of mahabhav begins to sway, what the true nature of its greatest current is and what happens to the life of those who are dancing on those waves.
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Deep Inwardness During Kasth Moun
Mother would go to make Baba accept alms. She served the food on the leaf-plate, but Baba’s frame of mind could not grasp the items on the plate. Mother had to say many times that this is roti, this is rice, this is vegetable. Once, during alms, Mother told Baba – this is vegetable, you may please eat it.
No sooner Mother said it, Baba instantly ate it up. He ate the entire vegetable. After his alms, when others ate that vegetable, they could not eat it. It was too spicy. Seeing the fierce chilly, Mother said in an astonished state – “Hey Ram! How Baba must have had this vegetable? He cannot tolerate even the smallest fraction of chilly. He must have undergone great sufferings eating this vegetable”!!
The reality was that Baba was far away from the platform of ‘experiencing’ sufferings. ‘binu man tan dukh sukh sudhi kehi’ – (without the mind, how does the body know of happiness and distress). After entering the kingdom of bhav, Baba has so greatly surpassed his bodily platform that even the spiciness of that dreadful chilly too could not have an effect on him in that stage of bhav-absorption. Experiences and mindfulness of sour-sweet-hot-bitter lasts only as long as the connection with the body exists.
Similarly, there is one incident of Ratangadh. Mostly, Mother made Baba accept alms at sunset and Babuji would go at noon to feed water. Once, Babuji went up to the room on the roof-top to feed water. Baba used to live in this solitary room. Inorder to avoid any kind of interference for Baba, the arrangements were made for Baba to stay in the solitary room on the roof-top. Babuji realized that Baba is not in his room. Babuji began to think if he has gone to the washroom, but mostly he does not go at this time! And then Babuji saw that Baba is standing on the terrace. He had only a loin cloth on his body. It being summer, the heat was so fierce that the soles begin to burn no sooner the feet is kept on the terrace. Seeing Baba standing in such a fierce heat on the burning terrace, Babuji was greatly disturbed. Baba, however, was standing at great peace. Inwardly-Baba had neither the perception of his body nor any feeling of the burning terrace. Babuji held Baba by his hand and brought him into the room. After a while when the heat reduced, Babuji made Baba drink water.
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Those days, Ramsanehji and Radheshyamji were the personal servants taking care of Baba. Once Ramsanehji described Baba’s state of bhav – Baba would be so deeply absorbed in bhav that while accepting alms he had no awareness of the food. He would take one morsel of food in his mouth, but he would forget to chew it and to swallow it. Entering deep into the kingdom of lila, the mind was completely separated from the body. Without the mind, the activities of the body are hampered on its own. Mother had to sit for very very long periods to make Baba accept his alms. After every short while he had to be reminded to take the next morsel or to chew or to swallow. By reminding him, when the mind would come down to this material world, then he could chew the morsel and swallow it. It would take about one to one-and-half hour to make Baba accept these alms. Mostly Baba would not be aware of his body. During kasht moun days, if Baba stands , he will stand continuously at one place for four-four hours. In which waves of bhava he is being swept off, he alone knows, however for those who see him, he appears like a statue made of stone.
After accepting kasth moun, Baba’s inwardness remained at its peaks for one-and-half to two years. During this period, he never even once lifted his vision to look at anyone. When Baba had to move from one place to another, he would go with Babuji. And as they walked, either Babuji would hold Baba’s hand or Baba’s vision would be fixed on the border of Babuji’s Kurta. Baba would walk holding on to that end of the kurta from the back side.
Sages and Scriptures say that this is the innate and natural result of profound absorption in the ocean of pastimes. Such a person neither talks, nor walks nor moves like ordinary people. His speechlessness-motionlessness-stillness itself becomes the biography to the divine transcendental state of uninterrupted relish of mellows and deep absorption in mellows. The Sages among Demigods, Sri Narada Muni, has said that having known Him and attained Him, that lover in perfection ‘na ramate, notsahi bhavati, matto bhavati, stabdho bhavati, atmaramo bhavati’ and ‘tatprapya tadevava lokayati tadeva chinatayati’. That detached, non-enthusiastic, intoxicated, speechless, self-rejoicing lover beholds only Him and meditates only on Him. It is explicitly said in Srimad Bhagavat Maha Puran ‘vikridito amrtambodhau’. Meaning, devotee of Lord Hari sports in the ocean of nectar. In the kingdom of love, the state of love is such, where the lover who has attained perfection in mellows constantly swims through the waves on the ocean of mellows. Based on his own experiences, Babuji has given indications to that indescribable and inconceivable state as below –
Inside is the sport that is greatly exceptional,
Outside he looks a soundless abstract.
Who will say? To whom? How the experience there is?
Unable to leave for even a moment those ever new mellows.
From coming out the pastimes prevents him,
Inside he is relishing that pleasant gentle one.
Giving up those pastimes is greatly difficult, impossible,
And so, unable to do anything externally.
Sweet beautiful nectarian pastimes constantly,
Awake are the emotions in them, asleep they are in the external world.
In them absorbed is mind-senses-limbs-intelligence,
Actions of outer intelligence halted due to this.
The cessation of all external activities indicates the absorption of mind-senses-intelligence of that pastime-dweller. Baba’s detachment to the world and severe indifference to the body, such an extraordinary oblivion of proprietorship (‘me-my’) shows the indications of that indescribable state that – Baba is constantly, incessantly, and by all means is absorbed and immersed in the divine transcendental nectarine name, nectarine form, nectarine love, nectarine pastimes, nectarine qualities, nectarine nature of Priya-Priyatam Sri Radha Madhav.
Baba has many a times expressed that during the period of kasth moun several times the flow of bhav would be so fierce that his head would ache. It appeared as if the head was bursting. That flow of mellows is the object of the transcendental kingdom and he would experience the incapability of the body to withstand the weight of that divine object. The excessive flooding of mellows is the cause of bodily infirmity that leads to rise of various ecstasies in the body. Baba’s head would ache at times. When such a situation arises and when the situation crosses the limits of tolerance, Baba would come out of his kutir and look at the vastness of the sky, the greenery of the trees and the flowers of the vines, so that the bhav would relax a little and the result of seeing the vision of nature was always favourable. After about an hour or two would elapse, the bodily state would return to near-about normal.
* * * * * * *
One more event is worth meditating. After Baba’s kasth moun, Babuji took upon himself many of Baba’s responsibilities. Earlier when Baba was active, he himself would be anxious of the welfare and accomplishments of many spiritually inclined people. However due to the deep inwardness of Baba after the fierce vow of kasth moun, the extend of Babuji’s responsibility greatly broadened. Thakur Sri Ghanshyamji had become quiet sick; therefore Babuji called him over from Vrndavan to Ratangadh for his treatment.
With the treatment Thakurji slowly regained his health. One day Thakurji began to play the sarangi (a kind of violin) in his room. He was playing the pilu raag. At this time, Baba came out of his room and went to the washroom. Thakurji’s room was at such a distance that the vibrations of the sarangi was well reaching the washroom. Here Thakurji was playing in his own spirits and there Baba was in the spirits of pilu raag. There is a composition by Baba where Vrshabhanu Nandini Sri Radha is sitting on her knees on the white soft sand on the banks and praying humbly to Yamunaji – ‘Kalindi, please flow gently, my beloved will enter on the other side’. This line is sung in pilu raag only. Lila-absorbed Baba, swaying in the waves of pilu raag, lost complete awareness of time. In this bewildered state, Baba stayed in the washroom for more than three hours.
How would Baba know what is happening outside? Service-disposed-Sri Ramsanehji and Sri Bhagatji were in great anxiety over what has happened? Baba never remained in the washroom for so long. Maximum only half an hour, but today it is more than three hours. Sri Ramsanehji informed the matter to Babuji. Instantly Babuji proceeded to the washroom. No sooner he reached, the waves of the sarangi entered his ears. Babuji immediately realized that as a result of the intoxicating effect of the sarangi, Baba is not aware of himself. Baba can be handled later, Babuji first went to Thakurji’s room. Seeing Babuji, Thakurji nervously stopped his sarangi and stood up with his hands folded. Placing his hands on Thakurji’s shoulders, Babuji said – “Brother, Baba loves the sounds of instruments, and of all, he loves the sarangi the most. One more thing, of all the raags, pilu raag gives a great rise of mellows. The pilu raag played on a sarangi has created such an effect that Baba has lost his own self-awareness. It has been three-and-a-half hours since Baba has been in the washroom and till now he has not come out. Since three hours he has lost his self-awareness”.
Thakurji could not understand whether he should consider this as a glorification of his playing the sarangi or a warding off from playing the sarangi. Hearing this from the mouth of Babuji, Thakurji was feeling timid, but at the same time happy. Happy that Baba is in the spirit of his own mellows, but the fact that Baba had to stay in the washroom for three and a half hours made him feel no less timid. Babuji then went to Baba and requested him to come out of the washroom.
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The Poem ‘Jay Jay Priyatam’
The inspiration to compose the poem ‘Jay Jay Priyatam’ first came up in the land of Vraj. From November 1956 to April 1958 Baba and Babuji were at Ratangadh. In January 1958, Baba and Babuji went from Ratangadh to Vraj to perform the parikrama of Sri Giriraj. A group of devotees, who had come from various different places for the sake of parikrama, also accompanied them. All were accommodated at the Birla Mandir which is located between Vrndavan and Mathura. During those days, Baba was following the greatly austere vow of kasht moun. Therefore, a room was arranged in the Birla Mandir for his exclusive seclusion.
Once, Baba was sitting in the open area of this Birla Mandir facing towards Sri Dham Vrndavan. All of a sudden, his eyes poured an outflow of tears, not ordinary, but an unrestricted flow. There was no cause, and the unrestricted flow of tears was drenching Baba’s cheeks. At that very moment, Baba saw a peacock dancing. This caused an increase of bhav. The speed of bhav increased so high that he could no longer see the Vrndavan and the Vraj that was in front of him. The gross Vrndavan disappeared and there appeared in the vision of Baba, the divine transcendental Vrndavan. Not only the divine transcendental Vrndavan, but also a wonderful ever-fresh series of divine nectarian pastimes of that transcendental Vrndavan. The context and sentiments of the pastime unfolded as the stanzas of the poem.
There was no sequential order in the composition of these stanzas. However, this lack of sequence gave rise to a wonderful foredoomed supposition. It so appears that inorder to present this wonderful fortune, by some inconceivable arrangement it was unable to assimilate the sequential order in the composition of the stanzas. At this time, from the way in which the lines were being composed, Baba could estimate that the poem that would be composed in the future, will have 11 shataks or sections each of 100 stanzas. (i.e.1100 stanzas). He composed eight lines of the first shatak, four or eight lines of the second shatak; and in this way four or eight or sixteen lines of each shatak were composed. The initial lines of this composition began at the Birla Mandir. The chaos of the sequence gave Baba the indication that a total of 11 shataks will be composed.
As soon as Mahabhav-filled Baba got an inkling that there is an indication of a composition of a future poem with 11 shataks, immediately, he told Priyatam Sri Krsna in a reproaching mood – What is the benefit of making me repeat that which has already been written till today by many devotee poets?
Baba was in Sri Radha bhav. Addressing him exclusively, Priyatam Sri Krsna replied in extremely loving words – Praneshvari! You just do the composition.
Again Baba said in the same mood – That composition will only be a copy. Why are you unnecessarily engaging me in futile endeavors? If you really want to make me compose, then do some such thing that has never been done till today. Let it be a new innovative composition.
Adding more sweetness to his request, Priyatam Sri Krsna said – O beloved of my life, the composition will be in accordance to your sentiments only.
When Priyatam Sri Krsna , who is more dearer than life, accepted Baba’s sentiments, then there was nothing more left to be said. Baba’s mind was always absorbed in the ocean of pastimes of Sri Priya Priyatam. As a result, the waves of sentiments of the mind manifested easily and abruptly in the form of the lines of the poem. Prior to this, Baba had never composed any poem. He never even endeavored to compose any poem. Neither did Baba have any enthusiasm to be addressed as a poet nor did he have any desire to have any reputation in the world of poems. In his mind, Baba would have the ambitions to hear poems, but there never arose within his mind any inspiration to compose a poem. This was the very first time that a flow of poem has bursted out in the inner chambers of Baba’s heart. The song of the heart of a poet is called ‘Poem’. When the abundance of the sweetness of the delicate sentiments of the heart crosses its limits, it desires to take shelter within the soft delicate circle of the love-filled rows of poem. Who knows how beautiful, how sweet, must have been those waves of sentiments within Baba that, it began to descend as the beautiful words of the poem. What would the world know of what is happening within Baba! One could never imagine that during those solitary moments, there has been an auspicious beginning of waves of sentiments on the surface of poems.
Due to the severity of kasth moun, it was impossible to call for a paper and pen. And at the Birla Mandir, was the auspicious beginning of the sequence of the divine pastimes that arose in the path of his vision. Thereafter, for many years this poem remained safe within Baba’s memory. When the vow relaxed, Baba made Bai (Sri Savitri Bai Phogla) write them down. Baba would recite and Bai would write. Babuji too co-operated in this writing. Even with the relaxation of the vow of moun, the poem creation did not rest. Composition of other kinds of poems continued. It was not necessary that when the poem was being composed, Bai or Babuji would be present there. Many a lines would be composed, and when Bai would come, Baba would make her write. It so happened many a times that the lines of many poems would be forgotten, and those that were forgotten were lost forever.
This poem composed of eleven sections was named ‘Jay Jay Priyatam’. Every line of this poem ends with the word ‘Priyatam’ in the vocative form. Its appearance in every line is to indicate that every line is being composed by Pranpriya as a recitation to her beloved Priyatam. This poem is not one of the rhyming kinds. During the flow of the composition, if it rhymes it was the best, otherwise there was no desire in the mind to make it rhyme. There was neither any research nor any change needed, in the composed poem. The sentiments that would set into the lines and the manner in which they set – were assented. Yes, at one place Baba did not make a change, however Priyatam Sri Krsna made Baba do it. Whenever the poem was being composed, Priyatam Sri Krsna would be present in front of Baba. In the beginning of the first section, there is a line ‘gobar mitti se yadyapi thi avani lipi poti priyatam’. At first, the word ‘gobar’ was not there. Baba had used the word ‘gairik’ while composing. Priyatam Sri Krsna said – Don’t use the word ‘gairik’.
Upon receiving such an indication from Priyatam Sri Krsna, Baba changed the word from ‘gairik’ to ‘gobar’.
Similarly, once Priyatam Sri Krsna personally completed one of the lines. Baba had composed three lines of a stanza and the fourth line was not manifesting. When there was sufficient delay, completing the fourth line Priyatam Sri Krsna said – “pranon ka souda hota hai kshan me kuch aise hi priyatam”. This completion of the stanza can be seen in the fourth section, 324th stanza.
Once Baba said regarding the completion of this fourth section – “This line is not an ordinary sentence, rather it is a mantra.”
Many truths related to this poem ‘Jay Jay Priyatam’ has been mentioned in the preface of the book published. It is not right to repeat them. Some stanzas of this poem are being presented here below as a sample. Priyatam Sri Krsna has gone to Mathura with Sri Akrura. Life feels like a heavy burden to Vrshabhanu Nandini, the embodiment of love-in-separation. She wants to drown herself in the cooling current of Sri Yamunaji. Her heart-rendering outpour prior to drowning is as below :-
Dispersing water upon her head, Oh! She said to the river, Priyatam !
“Hey Sister ! Today I have come near you to cry, Priyatam !
Would you please give me a little coolness of your chest ? Priyatam !
My soul and body are burning, may they cool for a moment, Priyatam !
I have offended you, I was full of pride then, Priyatam !
Attaining the bluish-dark one everyday with me , I used to frolic, Priyatam !
Authority over the blue body made my intelligence mad, Priyatam !
How many times have I kicked you with my feet, Priyatam !
Those blue hands Oh ! were on my neck, I failed to count you, Priyatam !
Exuberant with the fragrance of the blue body I did not come to you, Priyatam !
Drinking the nectar from the fruit of the blue tree I did not meet you, Priyatam !
Hearing the sweet talks of that blue face, I did not hear your sound (talks), Priyatam !
Blue was the lap having attained, your lap did not please me, Priyatam !
Blue hands massaged my feet, no taste to serve you, Priyatam !
Those blue locks would wipe my sweat, I forgot you, Priyatam !
That wealth of mine is lost but, now I am a begger, Priyatam !
The true Queen I was yesterday of all these forest bowers, Priyatam !
All my pride shattered, today I’ve become pauper, Priyatam !
To sleep now I’ve come in your cooling lap alone, Priyatam !
You please don’t disappoint me, you please don’t deny me, Priyatam !
The disrespect by me, please forget them, Priyatam !
With your matchless coolness, with your unlimited blessings, Priyatam !
You please accept me in your blue cooling chest, Priyatam !

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The Shimlapaal Journey
In March 1960 worshipful Sri Sethji (Worshipful Sri Jayadayaal-ji Goyand) underwent a cataract operation in Bankuda. On that occasion worshipful Babuji, worshipful Ma-ji and worshipful Baba went to Bankuda. The most respected Sri Jayadayaal-ji Dalamiya too went along. Even the doctor who was to perform the eye operation went along in the same car. When the operation was successful, some of them came up with the idea of going to Shimlapaal and the program was fixed.
Here it is necessary to give an introduction on Shimlapaal. Shimlapaal is a small village within the disctrict of Bankuda, about 24 miles from Bankuda. It is that same village where the English Government had detained Babuji for 21 months. Like Yogiraj Aravind, earlier Babuji used to take part in politics. The revolutionaries attained active support from Babuji inorder to throw away the English rule out of India. The revolutionaries had lost some of the German made boxes full of cartridges and pistols, and Babuji had hidden some of the boxes at his place. Babuji took part in serving the nation without any fear. Because of being a part of the secret team and rendering assistance to the revolutionaries, Babuji’s name was noted in the police diaries. The police began to track Babuji’s movements. How can anyone’s active support remain hidden? Babuji had received indications one month prior that the Government is trying to lock him up. Even after receiving the indications, Babuji neither hid anywhere nor did he stop his activities. It was not even three months after his marriage that on 20th July 1916 the English Government arrested Babuji. First the Government put him behind bars for some days, later he was detained in the village of Shimlapaal. After 21 months of detainment, he was freed and he had to leave Bengal as per Government orders.
The name of the village Shimlapaal is a part of Babuji’s life. Shimlapaal has its importance both in terms of political life as well as spiritual life. After political life, the beginning of spiritual life also occurred at Shimlapaal. During this detainment at Shimlapaal, Babuji performed severe sadhanas. His sadhana began with chanting of the Holy Names, practice of meditation and study of scriptures.
During those days of detainment, there were no proper roads to reach Shimlapaal. Bullock cart was the only means. During those days, when Sethji had to send any post-letters or other necessary items, he would send them through the bullock-carts that went there from Bankuda. Now proper roads are built. All went to Shimlapaal by motorcars.
No sooner they reached Shimlapaal there was a sentiment-filled sight. Today Baba’s heart was throbbing. No sooner they reached there, Baba began to roll in the dust. Baba’s entire body was smeared with dust. His inner bliss was pouring out through his eyes. After that, everyone took bath in the river that Babuji used to bathe every day.
The Government had made arrangements for Babuji to stay in the house of Sri Adharchand Mandal. Babuji spent his 21 months in the house of Sri Adharchandji. All of them went to his house. The wall in that house on which Babuji had written “Sri Nrtya Gopal”, was still there in the same way even after so many years. Babuji showed them that “Sri Nrtya Gopal”. Towards the middle of the detainment, Government had allowed Babuji’s wife to go and stay with him, and she too had stayed there. In this journey, worshipful Mother had also come along. She began to say – cooking was done here, bathing was done here and here was where we took rest. Hearing these descriptions was greatly pleasing. Worshipful mother explained how they had planted the flower-plants, how people got their homeopathic treatments, and how much it benefitted people of big posts. Once a dumb and deaf person came for homeopathic medicine and he was stubborn that he will not go without the medicine. To discard him, considering him to be a drug-addict, Babuji gave him homeopathic opium. The Lord showered such a mercy that with this he was able to speak and hear. With this incident, Babuji became greatly respectable and trustworthy to one and all.
At one place in Shimlapaal, the grains were getting dried up. Babuji toasted them on the stove. Baba filled up his bag with that parched paddy. He gave everyone present there, one-one grain as Prasad. Baba paid much higher price than the actual price of the grain to the owner of the grains. As they left Shimlapaal, everyone offered their obeisances to that holy land.

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Shodash Geeth
The internal life of Babuji took up the natural form of sometimes swimming across the nectarine waves of the ocean of mellows of Sri Radha Madhav’s divine love and sometimes drowning in its endless depth. Whether the situation be common or uncommon, to relish the pastime-mellows of Sri Radha Madhav, that too to relish them uninterrupted while safeguarding oneself from the eyes of the world was the most concealed part of his profound personality. When the experience of mellows become dense by constant swimming in its ocean, all his material activities would abruptly come to an end and his body would become stunned. In such a state, externally no consciousness could be perceived other than the ingoing and outgoing breath. In this situation, Babuji would remain still and powerless for hours together. To hide this state of deep bhav-samadhi (trance) from others, Babuji gave it a nice frame of words that ‘my head has gone crazy’. In this state of trance, Sri Priya Priyatam’s ever-increasing and augmented beauty, sweet outpours, elegant pastimes and matchless visions would appear in front of Babuji. And of those mulititudes of divine transcendental episodes, Babuji would confine some of them into words. These verbal expressions were sometimes in the form of prose and sometimes as poems. Babuji used to write these self-composed stanzas in a notebook and he would always keep this notebook hidden. This notebook was the most concealed treasury full of divine, mellow-filled, manifest episodes.
An incident of Radhashtami 1960. Grand preparations for the festival were going on. About 4-5 days prior to Radha’s birth-day, during the solitary moments an exceptional pastime of Priya-Priyatam Sri Radha-Madhav manifested to Babuji. Visions of sentiment-filled surrender and hearings of ras-filled outpourings had occurred even in the past, however today’s glimpse was unprecedented and indescribable. Today this glimpse, of mahabhav-rasaraaj Sri Radha-Madhav’s mutual conversation full of surrender towards each other, was by all means transcendental and sweet beyond all limits. Babuji’s body and mind were greatly soaked and overwhelmed with this uncommon mellow of madhurya. When this extra ordinary situation relaxed a bit, Babuji took up his notebook and out of all the writings, he selected about 16 poems based on his ras-experiences. Eight of them were the outpourings of love-personified Priya Sri Radha and eight were the outpourings of love-personified Priyatam Sri Krsna. He arranged these 16 poems in such a way that first poem is the love outpourings of Priyatam Sri Krsna towards his life’s worshipable Sri Radha and the following second poem is the love-rendition of Priyatamaa Sri Radha towards her life’s worshipable Sri Krsna. Hearing Radha’s rendition, Priyatam Krsna again expresses his love in the third poem and in the fourth poem Sri Radha is again expressing her surrender unto Him. In this sequence, both lover and beloved is offering their love to each other. These sixteen poems are thus the mutual conversation between Priya-Priyatam Sri Radha-Madhav, which gives one a vision of love that is devoid of any trace of lust, and a love that is happy in the happiness of the other. The sentiment in each poem becomes deep to deeper and deeper to more deeper. Thus becoming increasingly deeper, the final 16th poem leads to such a transcendental form of that supremely splendid love, which is a rare example of the state of mahabhav.
On that occasion of Radhashtami festival, many devotee singers from Vrndavan too arrived. As per the orders of Babuji, a special program was arranged. An extremely large picture of Sri Radha, the embodiment of love, was kept at one place. And a little away, on another place was kept a huge picture of love-personified Sri Krsna. One singer was made to sit behind Nanda-nandan Sri Krishna’s picture and another singer was made to sit behind the picture of Vrshabhanu Nandini Sri Radha. When the program began, first the singer behind Sri Krsna had to sing the first song and then the singer behind Sri Radha had to sing the next. In this way one by one, the sixteen poems had to be sung.
Babuji and Baba arrived at the assigned time. Devotees had assembled much before. When Baba and Babuji took up their seats, the program of singing the sixteen poems began. As was instructed, one by one the sixteen songs were sung. All the assembled devotees attained great happiness with the sixteen songs, however Baba’s situation was of different kind. ‘thakit bachan lochan sajal pulak pallavit deh’ (meaning – ‘tired words eyes tear-filled shivering bud-soft body’). Hearing this line, Baba was stunned. A diamond can be recognized and judged only by a jeweler. Baba’s bliss and wonder found no limits upon seeing this inconceivable and indescribable ras-filled expression full of the highest bhav in such a simple language.
The program of singing the sixteen poems completed and the festival of Radhashtami was conducted in full bliss. Later Baba told Babuji – You please compose ‘vandana’ (obeisance prayers) and ‘pushpika’ (offering prayers) also. Add the ‘vandana’ to the beginning of the sixteen poems and end it with the ‘pushpika’. Please print this sixteen poems along with the vandana-pushpika and then give it to me.
Babuji composed 5 stanzas of vandana and 5 stanzas of pushpika and added it to the sixteen poems. The book composing this was named ‘Sri Radha-Madhav-Rasa-Sudha’. This book, published by Gita Press, is known by the name ‘Shodash-Geet’.

Baba’s mind was constantly overwhelmed with the wonderful coincidence that such an extremely rare object has today become available in our hands. This is a unique example of the mercy of the Lord. The world probably may not understand the glories of Sodash-Geeth, how does it matter? The quality of an object does not depend on any understanding or stateliness of its self. By its own very qualities, this Sodash-Geeth is self glorifying. Baba desired that this Sodash-Geeth be preached far and wide, so that the world would know how pure, matchless and divine is the love of Priya-Priyatam Sri Radha Krsna, which is full of the sentiments of surrender. Also so that, practitioners of devotion may consider it as an ideal to follow in their practice and thus attain divine love of Godhead.

Baba gave great importance to the study of Sodash-Geeth with the view that the practitioners of the path of love may receive special light from it, and also so that the relishers of love may attain great relish from it. It is said that the period of time after midnight, from 2 am to 4.30am is the divine period when the siddh-sages move about, and they shower blessings upon the rightful souls, and it is the period to meditate on the Lord with concentrated mind. A thought arose in Baba’s mind – if someone could recite this Sodash-Geeth to me everyday during this divine period from 2 am to 4.30 am for a total of two and a half hours. Bhai Sri Natwarlalji Goswami (Sadhu Krsna Premji Maharaj) attained this great fortune and for many years he constantly recited the Sodash-Geeth faithfully to Baba everyday during the nishanth period. Inspired by this, many practitioners of devotion have taken up the daily practice of reciting the Sodash-Geeth during this divine period of two and a half hours.

Baba took up many programs to preach the Sodash-Geeth and made extra ordinary efforts to establish it. Baba called upon many learned scholars to translate the Sodash-Geeth into many languages so that it could reach every nook and corner of India. Thus the Sodash-Geeth was translated into sanskrit, oriya, tamil, telugu, malayalam, kannada, sindhi, urdu etc. Besides this, it was also translated into english, german, french and russian languages, thus crossing the borders of India. The Sodash-Geeth was translated into sanskrit so that the non-hindi speakers, who understand sanskrit, may understand the meanings and be able to sing the Sodash-Geeth and and thus float in the sweet waves of the mellows of love.

The translations into foreign languages were well received in the foreign countries. In America, the christians at the Free Communion Church of California situated in Vilayar-Lake-Highland, were inspired to use the English translation of Sodash-Geeth in their worship. In one of their letters they inquired about the biography of the composer of Sodash-Geeth. In their letter, they expressed their desire to attain permission for the printing of the English translation of the book ‘Gopi Prem’ by Babuji. Similarly, a German publisher printed the german translation of Sodash-Geeth out of his own personal desire.

Sodash-Geeth was translated as poetry and as prose. Similarly, an illustrative commentary on the same was also done. Baba inaugurated the compilation of the poetry version commencing from the eleventh poem, and not from the beginning. There is a special reason behind the eleventh poem being the first to be paraphrased. This will described later. The explanations were written in 250 poems, each consisting of 4 stanzas. All the sentiments that arose in Baba’s mind could not be contained within these 250 poems.

Once Baba said that if we consider to equate 250 poems to one ikaayi, then we could compose 17-18 such ikaayis. After the eleventh poem was paraphrased, the idea sprang in Baba’s mind to have the entire Sodash-Geeth paraphrased. He therefore began to get it paraphrased from the very beginning. The Sodash-Geeth begins with the five poems of Vandana. About 2 – 3 poems were paraphrased and then it came to a halt. Babuji’s health deteriorated to a great degree as a result of which Baba had to spend a lot of time in serving him as well as in handling his treatments. When Babuji became absorbed in the eternal pastimes, the sentiments to have it paraphrased came to a complete halt.

It was Baba’s personal brainwave to have a temple of Sodash-Geeth established. Baba got the eighteen poems of Sodash-Geeth engraved on a special metal plate. The entire Sodash-Geeth was engraved very artistically on thirteen metal plates, each of 18 1/2 inch in length and 11 inch in breadth. When this Sodash-Geeth was engraved and brought to Gorakhpur, they were placed in Babuji’s room with great honor. Each metal plate was wrapped in a yellow cloth. Then from Babuji’s auspicious room the procession of the metal plated Sodash-Geeth began. Each of the wrapped metal plate was placed upon the head of each devotee. The saintly rasik couple, Baba-Babuji, walked along with this procession. The entire atmosphere was surcharged with vibrations of the sweet sounds of Harinaam Sankirtan and with the sweet notes of the musical instruments. The procession began from Babuji’s room and reached the roof-top room above the new cottage near Gita Vatika, where it was to be placed. They were placed with great honor in beautiful wooden cupboards and were ceremonially worshipped. The Deity form of these metal plates was thus established in the Sodash-Geeth temple in the year 1963. Some devotees have engraved them on copper plates and have placed them as Deity forms for their daily worship.

At various places the Sodash-Geeth was engraved on marble walls. It is also placed with its oriya translations in Sri Jagannath temple of Sri Jagannath Puri. Similarly, it is also placed with its Brajbasi translations in the famous Sri Radha Raman temple of Sri Vrndavan. With Baba’s endeavors they attained permission to establish these on marble stones in various many temples. Besides, it is also placed in many other locations on stones. It was also placed on stones at the location where Baba performed his daily Giriraj parikrama.

Baba had first heard the Sodash-Geeth on the occasion of Sri Radhashtami, when the singers were seated behind the huge pictures of Sri Radha and Sri Krsna. In 1963 Baba organized a very special occasion for the pran pratishtha (installation) of this Sodash-Geeth. As per Baba’s taste Sri Sri Ramji Sharma’s Raasmandali group of Vrndavan were invited and were made to enact the beautiful raslila of Sodash-Geeth. This procedure of installation is very wonderful and unique. It was seen and heard for the first time. When a new temple is built, new Deities are established in it and then a detailed worship based on scriptures is performed, with which the Lord is installed within these Deities, and in this way the Deity is worshiped as the Supreme Lord by one and all, and the Lord fulfills the desires of the devotees. Similarly, Baba made Sri Priya Priyatam of the raslila to recite the Sodash-Geeth, thus completing the installation act. If that procedure is Shastra-approved, then this procedure is Saint-approved. Being compiled by the great siddh saint, Babuji, this Sodash-Geeth is by itself a siddh poetry. It has the param siddh words of Babuji. Therefore, there was not the need for such a procedure. However still, merely to enrich the faith of people in general, Baba took shelter of such a procedure.

The raslila of Sodash-Geeth continued for four days. The festival of Deepavali was celebrated all four days at the place of the raslila. The paths on all four directions were decorated with festoons. Either sides of the path were decorated with red powder and a hundred ghee lamps were lit up on either sides. Nets of electric bulbs were hanging on the branches of all the trees, plants and shrubs. Its colorful blinking lights were highly attractive. Four poems were recited each day. The Vandana and Pushpika poems were recited by the sakis and the singers. However, the main poems were recited by Sri Priya Priyatam. The recitation by Sri Priya or Priyatam was followed by Goswami Sri Chimmanlalji’s explanation of the poem in Brajbasi language. The audience were in abundance to watch this raslila. However the main audience were Baba and Babuji. When Sri Priya Priyatam would sing the Sodash-Geeth in deep sentiments, it appeared as if an ocean of nectar was surging. It so appeared that for all four days the eternal nikunj lila of the eternal abode is taking place right here. All four days the audience felt elated. When this was the experience of the general public, then what can be said of the unmatched relishers of mellow, Sri Baba-Babuji !! Inside, outside, everywhere was the all-embracement of the extraordinary mellows. Everyone was absorbed in the mellows to the degree of their capabilities. The entire program was full of relish.

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An extra-ordinary event related to the Sodash-Geeth occurred in Baba’s life which indicates the reason Baba gives great priority to the eleventh poem. Once, Baba was deeply immersed in Radha Bhav mahabhav. Wonder what incident occurred in that Kingdom of Bhav that established Baba in a state of maan ( sulkiness). Baba’s eyes and mind were full of heavy reproach towards Pran Priyatam Sri Vrajendra Nandan. Swaying in those sentiments of reproach, Baba went to the washroom. While walking towards the washroom and while returning, Baba was constantly reproaching Pran Priyatam Vrajendra Nandan not only within his mind, but also with his words. Then, Baba had his bath and entered his kutir.

Baba’s kutir is at a considerably desolate and quiet location. Within that kutir is another solitary room. Nobody had entrance into this solitary room. Baba’s personal servants – Sri Bhagatji and Sri Ramsanehji could enter that room only to clean it. Besides these two personal servant, no one else was allowed to enter. In this solitary room is a short stool on which Baba would sit to perform his worship. As Baba stepped into the room, he saw the eleventh poem of the Sodash-Geeth placed open on that stool. Seeing this, Baba’s astonishment knew no limits. Baba stood stunned. He stood with astonishment wondering who has opened this book and placed the eleventh poem open! No one has entrance into this room. Only Sri Bhagadji and Sri Ramsanehi had, but they will never do such an act, they can not even think of doing such an act. So who has done this ? Who has opened this eleventh poem and placed it on the stool ? Baba stood like a statue in great bewilderment. His mind’s complication was constantly increasing. After thinking a lot, he was still unable to find a solution. And then, Pran Priyatam Sri Vrajendra Nandan appeared in front of Baba. Their eyes met. He began to speak to baba in His sweet voice – Pranaadhike, please look into this eleventh poem.

Now the secret was no longer a secret. All bewilderments came to an end, and now it was absolutely clear as to how the eleventh poem was placed open on the stool. Baba replied – What should I see ?

Baba’s words had some annoyance. The bewilderment within his mind had choked his voice. As much was the disappoinment in Baba’s voice, as much was the sweetness in Pran Priyatam Sri Vrajendra Nandan. In a very sweet cajoling voice, Pran Priyatam said – Just look at it at least.

Pran Priyatam’s loving request had to be accepted. As per His request, Baba began to read – mera tan man san tera hi, tu hi sada svamini ek – My body and mind are all yours, you alone is my only mistress.

Baba who was in Radha bhav began to feel that my Beloved Sri Vrajendra Nandan is expressing his love through this poem. Not only this, He was constantly pouring out his unlimited love. As he read the poem, all his mind’s disturbance disappeared instantly and as the poem came to the conclusion, Baba’s entire existence was swept into the unlimited waves of that divine love.

At the completion of the poem, Baba instantly began to sing with an overwhelmed heart and tear filled eyes – hon to dasi nitya tihari ( I am Your eternal servant). This is the second poem in the Sodash-Geeth. Now there was neither the state of maan nor even the memory of that state. Rather, there was the uprising of the wonderful ocean of love. In Baba’s life whenever Sodash-Geeth was recited during the parikrama on the tenth lunar day, the recitation of the entire Sodash-Geeth was followed by the eleventh poem, followed by the second poem. This divine transcendental incident was the answer to the repetition of the two poems. And it was for this reason that Baba asked for the explanations to the Sodash-Geeth to commence from the eleventh poem.

The glories of Sodash-Geeth is unlimited due to the fact that the sentiments expressed within it arose from Babuji’s state of Bhav-samadhi. And, it’s unlimited glory has become deeply unlimitedly unlimited as a result of this direct experience of Baba. The more the hearing, singing, meditation and absorption of such a glorious Sodash-Geeth, the more is the perfection, by which one can get a divine glimpse of that blissful transcendental love, and by which one can get access into that divine Kingdom of that blissful transcendental love.

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Worship of the Elders
Venerable Babuji had been to Calcutta for some work. This incident related to his return-journey occurred on the platform of the Havda Station. Baba was coming along with Babuji to Gorakhpur. Baba was seated in an A/C compartment. The platform was over crowded with people who had come to see-off Baba and Babuji. There were all kinds of people – rich, poor, normal, excited. One could not even ‘think’ of ripping through the crowd to reach the A/C compartment. The compartment in which Baba was seated had huge glass panes. All of a sudden, Baba’s eyes fell upon a man who was standing very far away. It was Baba’s brother. He was elder to Baba and thus venerable to him. Baba got up from his berth and proceeded towards the door of the compartment. Everyone began speculating about why Baba is getting down and where he was going to. Baba got down and began to proceed directly towards him. Everyone gave way for Baba. Baba reached him and placed his head at his brother’s feet. Overwhelmed with love, his big brother became speechless, eyes filled with tears. There were still ten minutes for the train to depart. Baba held his hands and took him into the A/C compartment.
Baba brought him along and seated him in the berth. Being overwhelmed with emotions, the elder brother was speechless. His eyes were flooding with constant tears. As long as he was in the berth, Baba kept speaking in honor of him. Due to the extreme degree of love, it was impossible for him to speak, but his hands full of fraternal love, was moving over Baba’s back. However great a personality may Baba be, even though he may be a Siddh-Saint, but for his brother he was his own younger brother. And with overwhelming fraternal love, every moment his fingers and his pouring eyes were saying – “It is such a great pride that my brother who is a shining jewel in the world of spirituality has not forgotten me inspite of being such a great personality. May my brother progress spiritually to greater and greater heights and attain crowning success, this is my innermost deep benediction”.
Ten minutes passed like a moment. Upon hearing the engine whistle, he came out of the train. Baba paid his respects again to him.
Baba would tell us this incident saying – “Blessings of elders bring a lot to us in life. With their blessings, even the most difficult deed becomes easy. It is the worship of the elders that brought victory to Yuddhishthir in the Battle of Mahabharat. One should never give up one’s etiquettes, one’s parampara (disciplic succession), one’s virtue, and one’s culture. The disregard of the Aarya-parampara caused today by the western influence is the path to self-destruction”.
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The Ecstasy in The Festival of Dadhi-Kardamotsav
The celebration of Radhashtami at Gita-Vatika is held with the jubilation of the birth of Sri Radha on the ashtami (eighth lunar day), followed by the festival of Dadhi-Kardamotsav on the navami (ninth lunar day). This incident is of the year 1962. The festival of Dadhi-Kardamotsav is the authentic greetings-day, in which all the Vrajavasis express their inner happiness to the appearance of Vrshabhanu Nandini. In the festival of Radhashtami celebrated by Baba at the Gita Vatika, Sri Bajranglalji Bajaj would sing the greeting-songs. He should be named as Baba’s felicity-vocalist. As long as he lived he remained Baba’s main vocalist.
Sri Bajrangji is from Jabalpur. Handing over the responsibility of his home and family to his sons, he joined Babuji at Gita Vatika for a permanent stay. He used to constantly recite the Radha Sudha Nidhi. His heart was so saturated with ras to the degree that his eyes would flood with tears when he would hear the pastime-songs of Sri Priya Priyatam. His cheeks would be constantly wet as long as the ras filled songs were being recited. He was in the sentiments of friendship with Babuji. All his endeavours were motivated with Babuji’s welfare and to facilitate various arrangements for his happiness. When Babuji would become grave and profound, the credit to make him blissful would always be to Sri Bajrangji. Babuji, sober by nature, always preferred the solitariness of the room, but many times only Sri Bajrangji could bring him out from that solitariness into the midst of the bliss of the festivals. On the day of Dadhi-Kando, Sri Bajrangji would play the dholak ( a kind of drum) and sing the greeting-songs. Therefore, people began to name him ‘Dholakiyaji’. Not only that, in most of Baba’s most private programs Dholakiyaji would be present and his duty was to play the dholak in such programs.
It was somewhat necessary to give an introduction to Sri Bajrangji in the midst of this episode. It was Babuji’s great desire that Radhashtami be celebrated wonderfully, by which Baba who is truly passionate and full of mellows from head-to-toe, may attain the greatest happiness. Until now, no singers were ever dressed up in an attire suiting the occasion for the dadhi-kardamotsav festival. They would sing in their ordinary attires. And there never came the Rasmandali troup for the festival of Sri Radhashtami. However this time something new happened. One or two days prior to the festival Babuji called upon Thakur Sri Ghanshyamji and said – “On the day of Navami, Bajrangji will be the vocalist singing the greeting-songs, please dress him up in an attire befitting the songs. By singing in that attire, the stimulation of mellows will be greatly enhanced and Baba’s mind will be greatly pleased.”
This suggestion of Babuji was sufficient. Thakurji went to the market and brought decorative accessories that could be used on many persons. This year Sri Hari Vallabhji and Sri Sri Ramji too had arrived for Radhashtami. Sri Bajrangji was the main vocalist. Along with him Sri Hari Vallabhji and Sri Sri Ramji too accompanied. And Thakurji became the boy vocalist. All of them dressed in suitable attires for the occasion and arrived on the stage. This was the first time ever they were dressed up for this festival. What to say of the effect!!? The festival became colorful. It was not just colorful, but it was swelling with colors, it was overflowing with colors. The vocalist began to sing the greetings on the stage. The devotees assembled were seeing this sight for the first time, they were amazed at what was happening today. These amazed devotees were flowing in the waves of colorful mellows. ‘ param prem lochan na aghaata’. Babuji seated on the stage was in unlimited bliss. Baba was sitting besides Babuji with his eyes closed, deep in meditation.
An ambition was arising in the mind of the boy-vocalist (Thakur Sri Ghanshyamji). So long as Baba is sitting with his eyes closed, all the bliss is pale. As long as Baba is not seeing this novel sight with his own eyes and not flowing in bhav seeing this sight, all the happiness is petty, not just petty but empty. The vocalist boy thought that today bliss will come when greetings will be received from Baba’s hands. With this thought in mind, the boy-vocalist got onto the stage and offering obeisances to Baba said – Baba! Baba! O Baba! Obeisances! Greeetings! Greetings!!
Baba came out from his inner world and opened his eyes. Opening his eyes he was a bit amazed, a bit inquisitive and with a bit speculative vision he thought – Who is this boy standing near me and giving me greetings. The vocalist boy was wearing a moustache. As a result, Baba could not recognize him. Babuji understanding this told Baba – Baba! This is our Ghanshyam, isn’t it !
Immediately Baba burst into laughter and overwhelming with love he instantly gave a loving slap on the boy vocalist’s cheek.
The boy vocalist said – Baba! This cheek also.
Then Baba gave sweet slaps on the other cheek too. Whoever saw this sight were overwhelmed with tears. ‘prem pravaah vilochan baadhe’.
The boy vocalist immediately got off the stage and joined his vocalist family and began to dance jubilantly to give pleasure. Baba’s mind overflowed with bliss to such an extent that he stood up. Seeing Baba standing on the stage, the vocalist family felt unlimited bliss, their hearts’ jubilation brimming over to such a degree that words fail to describe. The ocean of their jubilation is today extravagantly tremulous. They were swaying, dancing and shaking their hips all the while singing the greeting songs. The entire scene was becoming more and more wonderful. Baba’s inner bliss was manifesting sometimes in the form of laughter, sometimes in smiles, sometimes glorifications and sometimes as upraised arms. The boy vocalist once again came upon the stage and swaying he began to say – Today Lali has taken birth isn’t it, give us greetings, simply loving slap will not do.
A lay-out of Vraj mandal was made on the stage. A forest of Tulasi was also made on it. Baba immediately bent down and plucked many tulasi petals. The vocalist boy opened his mouth and Baba put the tulasi petal with his own hands into his mouth. Then Baba gave the tulasi petals to Sri Bajrangji, Sri Harivallabhji and Sri Sri Ramji. Placing the tulasi petals received from Baba on a silver plate, and placing that silver plate on his palm, the vocalist-boy began to perform a wonderful dance. The audience was amazed at the visions they were getting to see. None were conscious of where they were sitting. All of them had become oblivion of Gita Vatika as well as their own selves. Today’s nectar is in actuality indescribable. ‘kahia kaah kahi jaayi na baataa’.
In the midst of all this, another new incident took place. Ramsanehji is greatly respectable to all of us due to his absorption in service, inward-disposition, modest nature, friendly speech etc. Such a sober natured Ramsanehji was sitting on one edge of the pandal watching these events. Seeing Baba standing on the stage he became overwhelmed with bhav. Generally Baba would always be in deep absorption on the stage and this was the first incident that Baba is standing on the stage and the happiness of his heart is spurting out. Ramsanehji’s entire being began to sway within these transcendental waves of the ocean of mellows. Overwhelmed in bhav, Ramsanehji got up from his seat and rifting through the crowd of seated devotees, he ran towards the stage. People were in great excitement over the actions of this sober-natured Ramsanehji today. All eyes were stuck on Ramsanehji. Ramsanehji got on to the stage and holding the lotus hands of Baba, he requested in a humble voce – Please climb down the stage and enter into the midst of the dance arena of the vocalist family.
Everyone was greatly surprised at this request of Ramsanehji. Baba could well understand that Ramsanehji was at the moment in another world. Therefore, he patted him lovingly and made him sit next to himself.
This mellow-state of Ramsanehji deepened the nectarine state of the atmosphere. Among the vocalist family, the jubilation of singing and dancing was constantly rising. Sri Parameshwar Prasadji Fogla was seated beside Baba. Baba removed the watch from his hand and offered it in the form of greeting-gift. The entire atmosphere was filled with the cheering sound of ‘Jay Jay’. Baba was not happy with just this. Baba asked mother for a gold bangle. Mother removed her golden bangle from her wrist and placed it in Baba’s hands. And Baba gave it as gift to the main vocalist through Babuji’s hands. Now the cheers of ‘Jay’ bursted off in all four directions of the pandal. Neither was the jubilation of the vocalist family depleting nor was Baba’s emotions. Babuji was standing besides Baba. Baba pulled the end of Babuji’s dhoti, tore off an inch width of border from its end and gave it to Harivallabhji. Harivallabhji made a garland of it and wore it on his neck. All the vocalists received a similar border-prasad.
Everyone there were admiring the fortune of they who received this border-prasad. After this dadhi-kando festival, when Thakurji met Baba, Baba said – “Thakur! Today a transcendental divine vision has manifested. The desires I had 15-20 years back has today been actualized by Sri Poddhar Maharaj. That which I used to think twenty years back has today manifested in front of me. One more thing, do not consider the border-prasad of Poddhar Maharaj as ‘ordinary’. It is a greatly ‘divine’ object”.
Then Baba made a poem on that border and recited it to Thakurji. The poem is as below –
I have torn a corner of that beautiful Sanvara’s dhoti.
Do not consider it insignificant, in it is a gulf of the nectar of Vraj.
Artisticated by Radha’s hands, in its every atom is the playful Krsna,
Deeply intoxicated upon She who is clad in a blue saree.
In this way Thakurji conversed with Baba in the solitariness of the cottage. Thakurji detailed everything to Baba on how Babuji had encouraged him to buy the clothes from the market. Then Thakurji told Baba – Baba! We are the worshipers of the divine-couple.
Baba asked – What did you mean by saying this?
Thakurji said – Baba! Just as we received the border-prasadi of Babuji’s clothes, similarly we should also get prasadi of your clothes too.
Baba said – Thakur ! How will you miss this chance !!
Then Baba gave the prasadi of his own clothes. Sri Bajrangji, Sri Harivallabhji and Thakurji received this rare cloth-prasadi.

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A Resident of Switzerland – Shri Rudolf Suess
Shri Rudolf Suess, a resident of Switzerland from the city of Lyujern, was full of spiritual thirst from the very beginning of his life. As a result, at the age of 24, he left for India in a small motorcar crossing the borders of many countries on his way, finally reaching Gita Vatika on the 17th of March 1963.
Suess did not have the knowledge of Hindi. He was well versed in German, Swiss and French. His knowledge in English was just ordinary. In his first talks, he said – I have come to India in search of one such man who will help me attain God, or attain self realization.
I took him to Baba. Those days Baba was residing in his old Kutir. With great respect Baba asked him to take a seat. Besides, he also held Shri Suess’s hands within his hands and offered obeisances to him.
Simply by the sight of Baba, Suess attained a remarkable state of bhav. He talked to Baba for a very long time. After speaking to Baba, Shri Suess said –
Now I know I have found this man, Swami Chakradharaji who is the personification of the highest aim that every human being is searching for and at the same time he is the personification of the path that leads to this aim. I have found what I have been yearning for and at this moment my yearning is stilled. I feel complete harmony and I am put into a blessed state, beyond all words. The hour, that I was permitted to spend with Swamiji, belongs to the deepest experiences of my life.
Shri Suess spent about one hour with Baba in this first meeting. The talks in English that he had with Baba and the bhav-filled association that he attained were the most memorable moments in Shri Suess’s life. In this very first meeting itself Baba told him – I knew that you will meet me.
Shri Suess was so ecstatic with this meeting that he could not sleep at night. The next day, 18th March, Shri Suess bid farewell from Baba and left for Nepal. He wrote a verse about Baba in his diary – ‘I shall never forget him’. He attained immense bliss coming to Gita Vatika, at the same time his grief while leaving this spiritual atmosphere was no less. From 18th March till 7th November he wandered among various places in Nepal and India.
Now he desired to return to his home town, Switzerland. Before leaving, he came once again to Gorakhpur to have Baba’s darshan. He came on the 8th of November. By coincidence, it was the day of pre-Radhashtami festival.
Shri Suess left his luggage in a room, and after taking his shower, came to Baba. He offered obeisances to Baba as per Indian tradition. Baba gave him a seat to sit. He spoke to Shri Suess in English. During his talks, Baba repeated many times to Shri Suess – You and me are one. I am with you, I am in you. I am in your every atom.
He repeated this many times so that this truth may stay within his mind and he may have firm faith in the same. While talking, Baba got up, went into his kutir and brought a small bundle out. He opened the bundle and there were twelve clothes that were used in worship. Those clothes can be called as handkerchief. All twelve of them had signs of kumkum ( a red powder used in worship). Baba spread them out and asked Shri Suess – You please chose any one among these twelve.
No sooner Shri Suess picked up one cloth, Baba complimented with great happiness – Your choice has been wonderful and right. Please keep it safe. Keeping it safe will be of great help to you. This cloth will be of great importance in your spiritual life.
In actuality, this cloth became the wealth of Shri Suess’s life. He kept it with him always. In future, whenever he came to India, he brought it along with him. For him this cloth was a symbol of Baba’s presence.
Today is Radhastami. Therefore Baba made Shri Suess eat a portion of Prasad with his own hands. Shri Suess attained unlimited bliss. As a result of this unlimited bliss, once again he could not sleep at night. The next day, 9th November, Shri Suess stayed with Baba the entire day. He was riding the waves of bliss the entire day. A bliss that was indescribable. He had to leave that evening. This incident of farewell created a pain in his heart. And inorder to console him, Baba said – We will meet again.
With great enthusiasm, Shri Suess asked – When?
Baba said – When the time comes, you will know it yourself.
When Shri Suess bid farewell, Baba explained the meaning of a hindi song as below :-
‘Carry the splendor of my smile along with you, carry the fresh butter of my thoughts along with you. Have you not seen the little stars smiling, disregarding the dense darkness of the night? Then tell me why is the jubilation of your new sprout like lips fading in anxiety. Why are you becoming fearful of walking on the road of solitude. For your guidance carry the light of my life along with you.
Carry the splendor of my smile along with you. Carry the fragrance of my intimacy along with you. As you tread upon the path, if the lamp in your hand that lights your path blows off abruptly and unable to trace the path your feet paralyzes in the dense darkness of the night, why does your faith jolt and your feet slip in these adverse situations? Even though the dense darkness of hopelessness engulfs you completely, have faith that – at that very spot where your feet have stopped, your destination will come to you on its own. To attain the perfection of your goal, carry the wealth of my blessings along with you.
Carry the splendor of my smile along with you’.
This wealth of divine and beautiful sentiments was a transcendental gift in Shri Suess’s life. Having attained it, Shri Suess glorified his great fortune. With a greatly heavy heart, he bid farewell from Baba. Baba stood waiting at the door of his kutir as long the sight of Shri Suess was visible to him. Shri Suess left for Switzerland via Bombay.
In 1963 Sri Suess met Baba twice. After this, Shri Suess came to meet Baba in the years 1981 and 1991. He also came in February 1993 after Baba’s departure, with a heart full of heavy sentiments. Around the year 2000 Shri Suess left this world. Then his wife came from Switzerland in 2002 to Gita Vatika to offer obeisances to the Deity form of Baba.

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Festival of The Birth of Sri Vishnupriya Devi
Vasant Panchami of year 2020, that is, 19th January 1964, is the day on which Baba had celebrated in great ecstasy the birth of Goddess Sri Vishnupriyaji, who is the life and wealth of Nadiya-Bihari Sacinandan Sri Nimai Pandit. Sri Jaydayalji Dalmiya had great devotion towards Goddess Sri Vishnupriyaji. Prabhupad Sri Haridasji Goswami has made abundant literary compositions on Mahaprabhu Sri Caitanyadev, on Sri Lakshmipriya, on Sri Vishnupriya and on Sri Vishnupriya-Nimai. One of his topmost compositions in Bengali is ‘Sri Vishnupriya Natak’. The hindi manuscript of this composition was also worshipped on this day of Vasant Panchami. My assumption is that the translation of this Drama from Bengali to Hindi was done by Sri Dalmiyaji himself, although he would have got it edited by someone else. I also infer that just as Baba encouraged Sri Dalmiyaji for the translation and publishing of ‘Sanatan Shiksha’, similarly Baba would have given the responsibility of translating and publishing ‘Sri Vishnupriya Natak’ to Sri Dalmiyaji. This book was published on the Rasa Purnima of the year 2021, and the manuscript of the hindi version was ready.
No sooner the manuscript was ready, Baba had decided that both Goddess Sri Vishnupriyaji and this scripture will be worshipped on Vasant Panchami, 2020 and that this worship should be performed by Sri Dalmiyaji. There is still ten to eleven months for Vasant Panchami, but Baba began his advance preparations from now itself. One day, eight to nine months prior to Vasant Panchami, Baba called me and began to say – You have to write a poem. I will now tell you what its content and flow will be. When I tell you, you will not ask me any question, nor will you express any inquisitiveness. Whatever contents you remember from my descriptions will be enough. Before Vasant Panchami please do not show me the poem that you will write based on my description. And if you are unable to compose the poem then kindly do not feel dejected either. And if you have composed the poem, then on the day of Vasant Panchami I will recite it to Jayadayalji in the solitude of my kutir.
In this way, applying so many conditions, Baba kept speaking for about one to one-and-half hour. I was listening with great attention, but how much could I retain within my memory. Whatever I could remember began to enter the womb of forgetfulness within two to three months. ‘Now there is still so much time’ – thinking this I did not compose immediately. And as time passed, my memory began to fade more and more. After six-seven months, I could remember absolutely nothing. Baba’s description of the entire flow of the story was completely forgotten. I began to regret. Prayer is the only basis for the weak and the hopeless. I began to offer repeated obeisances and prayers to Goddess Sri Vishnupriyaji. After four to five weeks of continuous prayers, all the sentiments that arose in my mind got set into the lines of the poem. I was embarrassed of my negligence and forgetfulness. But now I was happy that I was not in a state of empty-hand in front of Baba.
Baba had great difficulty regarding the offering of food that was to be presented to Sri Vishnupriyaji. Everyone knows that after the daily morning worship, she would sit with a bowl of grains of rice in front of her, and she would chant the sixteen-syllable Hare Krsna mantra and for each mantra she would place one grain of rice into a second bowl. This chanting along with the grains of rice would go on till evening. In this way, the grains that were collected in the second bowl would be cooked, and she would offer that perfected rice to her life’s beloved Lord Sri Caitanyadev. She would eat some of it herself, and distribute the rest among devotees. Sri Vishnupriyaji’s life of surrender was one of severe austerities, great oblations, and the personification of divine sentiments. Offerings that are made to such a personality should be pure and sattvik to the highest degree. For this, Baba was in need of that wealth which is extremely pure, by which the ingredients for the offerings could be bought.
When Baba tested the purity of the wealth from every man who came to him, Baba was in great despair. Every rich man admitted that the wealth they had accumulated is not under the shelter of truth and is not bonafide. Moreover, even if the wealth is bonafide, it was in all respects impossible for them to accept that they have never mistreated their workers. Seeing this test of Baba, each and every rich kinsmen expressed their helplessness. Even the pious Government officers and the highly qualified teachers of big schools requested Baba. Baba questioned all of them whether they performed their job constantly, at all times, persistently. They began to experience helplessness in front of Baba’s questionnaire. Baba greatly desired with all his heart that the ingredients for Goddess Sri Vishnupriya’s offerings be bought by extremely pure wealth that is attained in extremely pure ways.
Seeing Baba’s distress, Goswamiji (Sri Chimmanlalji Goswami) said – Will you accept my wages for this pious deed?
Hearing Goswamiji, Baba remained silent for some time and then said – There is no place for doubt in the purity and piety of your wealth. The execution of the “Kalyan-Kalpataru’ magazine is the topmost deed. There is no particle of untruth in your life. Instead of 6 hours, you work for 13-14 hours every day, to the extent that you do not take a holiday even on Sundays. Of all the people that I have spoken till today, your position is the topmost. Inspite of all this, I have one fact that is to be thought of. You are distributing knowledge through the magazines. And in return, you are taking monthly wages for this deed. Now the phenomenon to be considered is that – is this act approved for a brahmana? As per the Hindu religion and Hindu culture of India, the Rishis who give knowledge in charity to the society live their life completely depending upon the mercy of the Lord. To give something, and then to accept something in return, this is business mentality. And the life of our Rishis are completely devoid of business mentality. They give knowledge in charity without any expectations. If you were a vaisya (business man) I would have happily accepted your pious wealth, but you are a brahmana, therefore now I am wondering whether I should accept the wealth acquired by you or not.
Hearing Baba’s words, Goswamiji fell silent. Hearing that the money acquired by a Vaishya can be accepted, I gathered the courage to request something. In humble words, I told Baba – Baba, I would also like to place a request.
Baba desired the topmost purest form of wealth for making offerings to Sri Vishnupriyaji, and at every step he encountered despondency. In such a bizarre state of mind, it was an adventure alone on my part to endeavor for any kind of request. Being fully aware of this I, however, still could not resist putting forward my request. Hearing me, Baba said – What do you want to say?
Baba asked me in a voice that carried some despondency and some apathy. Not finding the familiar sweetness in his voice, I tried to gather some boldness and began to say in fear. I began to say very slowly – Baba! When I was teaching in Sardar city, I used to spin yarn for many years. I would close my room. Reciting the verses of Sri Raaspanchadhyay I would spin the yarn. It would take me 45 minutes every day. I have till today not told anyone and neither have I had the courage to tell anyone that my desire behind this act was that this yarn be made into a cloth and that cloth be used for Your garments. All those yarns are still lying with me. I have made this endeavor and it is done with the topmost spiritual intention. My inference is that this yarn be sold and the wealth attained therewith be used for this worship.
Baba asked me – In the college where you were teaching, did you try to get any recommendation from someone inorder to be appointed, as a result of which you got the job opportunity and someone more qualified than you was disappointed?
I repeated – Baba ! Atleast in front of You, I will tell the truth. I had not taken any recommendation from anyone. There was an advertisement in the newspaper for this post by the college administrators. I sent my appeal letter and I was called for an interview. I was absolutely new to them, as they were to me. Many others too had come, but they gave me their appointment letter by their own accord.
With this description Baba attained complete satisfaction. Upon receiving Baba’s consent, the entire yarn was sold to a near and dear one. The cost of cotton was deducted from the amount that was attained by selling it. A balance of about 5 – 6 rupees were left. With this amount, the ingredients for the offerings – rice, gram flour, yoghurt, salt, turmeric, cumin seeds, ghee, coal etc – were bought and the preparations for the offerings began.
Now every single grain of rice had to be consecrated by the sixteen syllable mahamantra. Everyone desired to take part in this act. However, even for this act to be accomplished, Baba had made a special decision within his mind. Baba thought that this should be done by one who has true and firm devotion unto the lotus feet of the greatly austere Goddess Sri Vishnupriya and whose intellect affection is repeatedly succumbed to the greatest renouncement and to the topmost love of that universally worshipable one. With such thoughts Baba offered the complete fortune of performing this act to Sri Dalmiya-couple. Some people requested Baba – How many grains will Sri Jayadayalji and his wife be able to consecrate in one day?
Baba instantly replied – Even if only hundred grains can be consecrated in this way, I only need those hundred grains only.
Hearing Baba’s reply all became silent. The most respectable Chachiji (wife of Dalmiyaji) and Dalmiyaji took their bath, wore clean traditional clothes, sat on a pure seat, and began to consecrate each and every grain of rice by chanting – ‘Hare Krsna Hare Krsna Krsna Krsna Hare Hare Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare’. The number of grains that they consecrated from early morning till noon 2pm was used for cooking. Baba was very attentive about the purity of the place where it was cooked. The entire ground was covered by cow-dung. And Goswami’s wife did the cooking. Baba was greatly attentive at every step, so that everything be in line with the sentiments of the severly-austere, great woman-saint – Goddess Sri Vishnupriya.
Worship was duly performed on two new platforms for the universal savior- Goddess Sri Vishnupriyaji and the universally stimulating ‘Sri Vishnupriya Natak’. A Brahman couple was worshiped with great sentiments and offered food, clothing and wealth. Baba performed this entire worship through Sri Dalmiyaji. After the worship, there was a tumultuous kirtan with the names of Sri Vishnupriyaji and Mahaprabhu Sri Caitanyadev for a very long period. After this, that greatly divine Prasad was distributed among all. All could receive only a particle. But that Prasad was the most rare and the most powerful of all. The atmosphere around the kutir was surcharged with deep sentiments. Baba was in a unique state of ecstasy. Baba has many a times in the past said and even during the worship he said – ‘Crying is my life’. To say the truth, today was the festival of ‘crying’. Sri Vishnupriyaji is the personification of crying.
At night Baba recited the poem to Sri Dalmiyaji. It was winter and there was fire burning outside the kutir. Baba made Sri Dalmiyaji sit there. Some near ones too had come by their own desire and Baba gave them the opportunity to sit. Baba’s desire was total solitude, however that could not happen. The poem was read in front of everyone present. Hearing the poem, Baba glorified it and said – “So as to declare the potency of Sri Gangaji to liberate the degraded-sinful-fallen souls and to establish love in the entire existence of Sri Gangaji, not just this, also to fill every atom of that liberating existence with the fire of love-filled-crying, Sri Radha Krsna, abandoning the banks of Yamuna in Vraj, took up incarnation at the banks of Ganga in Navadvip – This truth is expressed very beautifully. I am telling the truth that seventy five percent of my sentiments has descended into this poem”.
I said in humble words – I had forgotten all that you had told me nine months back. I had greatly delayed to compose. When I sat to write the poem, I could not remember anything. Then I began to pray to Goddess Sri Vishnupriyaji within my mind. By her mercy, whatever has manifested is being written in this poem.
Baba said – Whatever is composed is extremely wonderful.
Then Baba told Sri Dalmiyaji – You please get this poem printed.
Sri Dalmiyaji was just thinking of getting it printed, by then Baba had already given his orders. That poem is given here at the end of this description.
I am being inspired in my mind to write a truth related to that yarn. The one whom the yarn was sold to, was one of our kin and he had kept it absolutely safe with him. The Khadi Bhandar of this area made a cloth out of that yarn. And the most beautiful event was that right on the day of Radhashtami, Baba wore that cloth. Events unfolded on its own, step by step, exactly as was desired by me. I was not able to gather the courage to say or do anything in this matter, but the all merciful Lord manifested it by Himself, by which my desire was fulfilled.
I feel greatly embarrassed presenting the above incident of spinning and selling of the yarn and the composition and recitation of the poem. It is not good to say one’s own glories and to write one’s own glories. Inspite of this fact, I have taken the audacity to write. The true inspiration behind this is to present a glimpse of Baba’s life which is one of an epitome of truth. This incident is an example to know how deep Baba would go into any matter, how greatly he would review any matter, how much he would investigate to reach to the crust of any matter, and how much he desired and maintained purity, piety and truthfulness. I am truly embarrassed that my name is tied to this incident, but I am carrying the heavy load of this embarrassment thinking that this will proclaim the glory of Baba’s personality.

Sri Sri Vishnupriya Stava – recited at Gita Vatika, Gorakhpur on the day of Vasant Panchami, year 2020.
Silent were the directions silent the night, silent the constellations of the sky,
Silent every molecule of Ganga, silent the blue-veil of the sky.
In the silence was the pulsation, silent conversation tender and incessant,
Satisfied the moon of the night, two hearts greatly naive.

Two lips move opening silently, at Ganga’s new bank,
Two hearts here blossom unrestrained, on the banks of Navadvip’s flank.
Decorated was the bed-chamber, a blanket of newly blossomed flowers on the bed,
A canopy of flowers over the bed, a festoon of flowers on the bed.

Sanctified with the fragrance of incense, charm resonating the entire sleep-chamber
Charm over charm increasing, attaining a world of pure charming love.
Serene were the waves of love that blossomed out of two loving hearts,
By their splendor, the charm of the bed-chamber abundant every moment.

On the bed in that chamber were the divine graceful eternal couple,
Sri Vishnupriya Caitanya Gaur, the lover-beloved ever novel.
Both immersed in the other, both the givers of incessant pleasure
Vishnupriya massaging the feet, Caitanya’s heart thrilling every moment.

Sweet waves of some curiosity, some longing, some inquisitiveness,
Arose softly, gently upon the face of Sri Vishnupriya
In that silence was the glimpse of soft-silent voice
Silently the soul asked – “Am I Your very Radha, my beloved?”

The silence of the soul heard the query – also the Navadvip-flank Ganga,
And every atom of that sleep-chamber, and Caitanya Gaur’s supreme soul too.
The silent query was met with silent answer by the rosy-lips,
By Caitanya Gaur’s lip-enjoyer, the eternal sweet playful smile.

‘Priyatame, How have you forgotten yourself, me, so naive?
We are eternal associates, related eternally, I am Madhav, You are Radha’.
The Soul enquired again – ‘Then where is the supreme daughter of the Sun?
Why was the beloved Yamuna abandoned? Why are we dwelling on the banks of Ganga?

The sweet smile then instantly gave the silent answer to the silent query.
‘World has attained the most rare liberation from Ganga
We have come to fill every molecule of the existence of that giver of liberation
With the fire of crying, in which one eternally burns in the blazing flames of love’.
‘Then do I have to burn in the fire of crying? Priyatam !
Do I have to flow in the waves of tears always’?
“You and I are one, therefore Priyatame, more dear than my life! Why will you burn alone?
In the fire of crying together will incessantly burn both of us.”

The simple curiosity beyond the reach of sound, manifested without sound
Succulent poisonous solution also attained at ease
Was heard by the sleep-chamber, the bed, the Ganges deep within,
The night and the moon, the sky and the water, the blue veil of the sky.

How many stars burst, came falling down from the vast blue veil of the sky
How many tears flowed from the cheeks of the Ganges
No one knows why the aggrieved breeze wanders saying with its mouth
The sorrowful anguish-hot story, of two separated hearts to the world.

At Nilachal’s shores of the blue ocean is seated the aggrieved
Gaur Sundar, his awareness flown away indefinite into the blue waves
Unto one lotus-feet of blue Krsna, all happiness-distress surrendered
All directions resounded with the pathetic crying of ‘Krsna’, ‘Krsna’.

Crying in the throat, crying in the hairs, crying of the eye’s every movement
Blazing-out came the fire of crying from every pulsation of Gaur’s heart
Searching for Krsna in the day, in the night, in the waters, in the sky, in moving-nonmovings,
Burnt was the pyre of Krsna-separation in every limb of the aggrieved Gaur.
One drowned the decorated corpse in the blue waters of Nilachal,
One drowned completely within the deep ocean of her own tears
The eternal enjoyer of Gaura’s heart burnt in the fire of separation of Gaur
Extinguised after being burnt, burnt after being extinguished, this was for the rest of the life.

How much tears flowed from Vishnupriya’s thirsty eyes?
How many wet sarees removed, from the burnt body of Gaur-separation?
From when is occurring the union of the waves of The Ganges
Saravati and Yamuna flowing incessant from the empty eyes?

How the dreadful desire of union, burning in the seat of Priya’s heart?
What an outcry (‘ha-ha’), in the body, in the mind and in the eyes?
‘ha-ha’ inside, ‘ha-ha’ outside, in every atom of inside and outside
The sound of ‘ha-ha’ pervaded the waters, the land and the sky.

The house filled with ‘ha-ha’ had not a pulsation of any sound
Dried eyes, dried life, dried was the entire courtyard of the house
Seated in the silent yard, was Vishnupriya with greatly silent mind
The aggrieved waves of tears from the bowed eyes asked – “O! Wealth of my life”.

Instantly from Gaur Sundar’s beautiful golden effulgence eternal touching
From the blue waves came the sound – “Say Priyatame! What is your desire?”
Like the veena-sound of the dream world, was heard the soundless voice trembling
The deep desperation of the waves of tears was silently announced.
“How long will I have to flow? Is this crying the only truth?
Burning-exhausting, exhausting-burning, is this the only life?
How long will these wet eyes melt? Why is the sandalwood of my heart so far?
Can I not desire for a vision? Is this maid-servant completely unfortunate?”

In the silent courtyard resounded the silent voice of the blue waves
“You and I are one, eternal associates, even during intolerable separation
Separation nourishes union, You and me will burn even more, Life’s beloved,
Beyond crying and laughter is again our union in the inner bowers”.

Hopes lost, lightning burst, vines separated at union with Gaur
Strength lost, stars burst entirely from the dark blue sky
Patience lost, bonds broke, of the broken heart, of the eye-sockets
Spreading all over, fell the tears, onto the courtyard of the entire universe

Drowned was the courtyard of Vasudha, drowned was the blue veil of the sky
Drowned was also the veil of Ganga, the flank of Navadvip
The entire existence of the veil too drowned in the tears, melting
Rest of the time, upon the two cheeks were the unchecked flow of spotless tears

That ‘Time’ is the eye-witness in this world, of the spotless waves of spotless tears
That ‘Time’ is the eye-witness even today, of the pure beauty of the new-bowers
Where radiates the pure light, of the yellow-blue elegant summit
In whose multitude of purity, is drowned every atom of the world.
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